ass crack...

sometimes if the stars and planets all align properly, Sam and I actually get to have sex!!

usually we’re so shocked that it actually happened that we need a snack afterward (what does one have to do with the other? I don’t know… any excuse for a snack I say!!) it’s usually kinda late but we stumble out to the kitchen and manage to make some toast or a cheese sandwich or something to nibble on while we sit in the dark and watch tv, enjoying that yummy after sex feeling where we’re all comfy and content

at least that’s what we used to do when we actually slept in the same room

it’s kind of our version of snuggle time… and I miss it

since our bed has decided to cripple me and I’ve been sleeping in my big comfy chair it’s really done a number on us – we don’t get nearly as much snuggle time and it’s NOT good for the pre snuggle activities either

Ambers post yesterday reminded me of this… and made me all warm and fuzzy – I spent the whole rest of the day checking astrological charts trying to see what I could arrange

if it was up to me sex would have been first priority when Sam got home – before the planets came undone and I wound up with a headache or someone called and ruined the mood or whatever other thing would happen that always happens that keeps us from the good stuff – not that I was particularly in the mood… I just felt like being close to him – I’ll let him worry about getting me in the mood… he has skills in that department

unfortunately we had a chiropractor appointment so my yummy sex and after sex bed picnic tv snuggle time would have to wait… in kittyville every minute you wait for sex greatly increases your chances of something interfering

anyway… we FINALLY get home and Sam was groping me (as usual) – and in true kitty style I looked at the clock… noticed it was 7:32 and told him he had 28 minutes (yes that is my idea of initiating sex… take it or leave it) hehehe

of course I was kidding… I was recording survivor (on my new KICK ASS DVR – WOO HOO) so there was actually no hurry

anyway… he shoved me into the bedroom and ripped off my clothes

yadda yadda yadda

about a half hour later the phone rings (did I mention I hate the fucking phone?!) we were still ummm… busy so we ignored it…

afterward all I wanted to do was grab a bowl of apple crisp which I had made earlier per Sam’s request… and sit down with my honey and watch *CSI (I’ve been DYING to see this seasons premier since ½ way through last season’s finale!!)

but the phone was blinking indicating that someone left a message – I had to know what fuck wad had called at 8 on ‘survivor sex night’ on the day the curse was broken (haaa sorry inside joke)

it was friend #2 from the post below – who shall henceforth be known as ‘ass crack’

his car broke down about a minute from our house – he was supposed to stop by and I was actually expecting him to be in our driveway when we got home from our appointment - when we pulled in I was kind of relieved that he must have changed his mind about stopping by – apparently he hadn’t… he was just running late

so the sex gods broke his clutch just so he wouldn’t interrupt us in the middle of the yadda yadda

but Sam had to go down and try to help him – which blew the whole after sex snuggle picnic tv thing =(

I wasn’t happy!!

BUT on the plus side… guess what!!

ass crack discovered that his new apartment has a little sound issue… as in he can hear EVERY SINGLE NOISE his landlord’s family (who live upstairs) makes

he can hear every word of every conversation… he can hear their cell phone vibrate!! he can hear when they take a piss or open the fridge!!

obviously this makes him uncomfortable… especially since that would mean they would also be able to hear him (once he got settled in and actually started LIVING there)

sooooooo he’s moving back in to his old apartment... and guess who is helping

GAH!! he's lucky we love him!! hehehe

* I have NOT seen last night's CSI yet (waiting to watch it with Sam) so PLEAAAAAAAASE don't tell me what happens

weekend update #9247

ever have one of those weekends where it just seems like you never stop running?

I had a headache all day Friday so I was in slow motion all day… AND I had a butt load of stuff to do AND we were supposed to be having company (Mr. & Mrs. Disorganized and their offspring) for dinner

I was making baked ziti (but only if they were coming because Sam and I can't eat an entire pan of baked ziti) - of course we were unable to make concrete plans until Friday afternoon so I was kinda rushed (or so I thought)

the idea was for them to come early because Mr. D had to work the next day – Sam was getting home at 3:30 and they just had to get their kid off the bus (at 3:30) and would head over then - so I figured they’d be here by 4:30 and we could have dinner at around 5

I should have known better… this couple is completely incapable of being anywhere on time – by the time they FINALLY called and said they were about 20 minutes away it was close to 6 o’clock

turned out he had a dr’s appointment that ran late and they apparently had to stop off to pick up dinner for the wife who is an on again off again non carb eater – evidently she’s back off carbs this month - if you ask me she could have gotten her dinner together earlier or TOLD me she wasn’t eating carbs and I could have made her a burger or something… or made something different for dinner!! something you can avoid the carb portion of, ya know? - I wouldn't mind at all as long as I was told ahead of time

but no… instead they decide to practically go fucking grocery shopping for her dinner on the way here when they were ALREADY over an hour late!! She got herself stuff for antipasto - which in case you don't know, is an italian hors d’œuvrey thing with a bunch of different cold meats, cheeses, vegetables and assorted stuff like olives, peppers etc.) – which meant she then had to cut everything up and put it together when they got here

why we continue to attempt to dine with these people is beyond me!! it’s one thing if they wanna make us wait until midnight for dinner when we’re at their house - we know they’re disorganized and tend to get dinner on late so we always grab a sandwich before we go there

but to be that late and disorganized when you’re going to someone else’s house is just not right – get it together for fuck sake!! they both have cell phones… if they have dinner plans and his appointment runs late couldn’t he call her and ask her to pick up what they need to bring here (if she insists on bringing her own dinner) that way when he gets home they can just come right over? instead of her sitting at home waiting for him and THEN going to the store?

we’re not exactly neighbors… we live about 40 minutes from eachother

anyway… they get here and he’s running around like a chicken with his head cut off trying to get something done with his bow so he can go out and shoot it before it’s too dark outside (which tells you how far past 5 they actually got here!)

I knew he needed to run out for about an hour while they were here – he had asked me if it was ok when he called to confirm dinner… but by the time we finally sat down to eat he was in such a hurry that I’m pretty sure he didn’t taste anything anyway… and Sam was so hungry by then he probably inhaled his food – and it’s a good thing too because by the time we FINALLY had dinner it was pretty well annihilated anyway…

apparently Mr. D was in the mood for dessert so on the way back from wherever he had to go he stopped off and picked up a cheesecake – by now it’s about 9pm – we (all but no carb lady anyway) slam down our overpriced underyummy supermarket cheesecake and they were off so that he could get to bed early for work the next day

I don’t think I’ve ever been so glad to see people leave (and I’ve been pretty damn glad to see people leave before haaa)

the thing is they don’t even realize that this is crazy – their lives seem to be so chaotic that this kind of lateness and running around is totally normal to them – I don’t know how people can live like that – but I do know one thing… no more Friday night dinners with the D’s!!

Saturday I had to do some of the stuff I didn’t get to do Friday (although I could have with the extra time I had with them being so late!!) we didn’t do much all day but somehow it still seemed rushed – eventually we went to barnes & noble just to get out… and look at books – well magazines in my case

we also broke our no chain food rule and went to Friendly’s – we were not happy with ourselves and our food wasn’t all that good – I had a honey BBQ chicken supermelt which has bacon on it and a couple times I wasn’t sure if it was actually bacon or rubber bands… or as Sam suggested – bacon flavored band aids

while we were waiting for our food I drew this blue elephant-like creature on a napkin



moving on...

our other bestest friend has lived at least an hour from us for years and years – AND his schedule is pretty much opposite Sam’s, as a result we don’t get to see him very much but he recently decided to move to a place about 15 minutes from us – WOO HOO – so Sunday we had to help him move – when I say we I mean Sam… I was just there for entertainment purposes…

he’s a single and very fly by the seat of your pants kinda guy - he was supposed to be pretty well packed and have his bed disassembled before we got there – but instead, out of the blue he called a girl from high school who he hadn’t seen in 15 years and went out with her for most of the day Saturday and then got called in to work all night so when we got there Sunday morning he was still asleep… in his fully assembled bed!!

so what we thought would take 3 hours ended up taking closer to 9

it wasn’t bad though… it was a beautiful day and we all got to hang out which was nice

but for not being prepared I took this lovely picture of his ass crack and posted it on my blog!!



the end

lots to do today no time to blog…

I have to trim something like 17 pounds of chicken for the freezer (my most hated and disgusting chore!!) seriously I HATE trimming chicken and/or packing up meat for the freezer!! it’ll probably take me 2 hours to get it done too!! GAH!!

I also have laundry to do and the floor is filthy and we’re possibly having company for dinner which means I have to make a pot of sauce and put together a pan of baked ziti

ya think I can get this all done within the next 4 hours – AND somehow manage to take a shower?

did I mention I also have a bit of a migraine (or something)

I did manage to pedal 2 miles on my new bike this morning even though I REALLY didn’t want to!! hehehe – I’m starting off small… my knees don’t like it when I ride the bike and then stop for more than a day or so – at least that was always an issue in the past – so now that I’ve started riding I HAVE to keep it up or I’ll be in agony

anyway I’m HOPING that even riding that little bit will give me a little more energy to get through the day – because I have been seriously dragging ass lately!!

anyway… I just popped in to keep up the momentum

have a GREAT weekend everyone!!

no video today but here’s a song (which I obtained completely legally haaa) when I was reminded of it's existence yesterday I could NOT resist playing it here for my sister in mental instability haaaaa LiVEwiRe - when all hope seems lost we can always listen to this and pretend our name is Nikki haaaa

stop the presses - I found a video



Jesus H. Christ on a popsicle stick!! if Dave Grohl was any hotter the world would fucking MELT!!

and the wiener is…

HOLY CRAP!!! I can’t believe that possibly the most vile, disgusting character to ever hit ‘reality’ tv is now cashing a check for half a million dollars!!

I’m sure right about now there are hundreds of BB fans vowing to never watch the show again… I just can’t get that upset… after all it was the very people he directed his venom at who actually voted for him to win!! if THEY could put aside the hurtful things he said and did to THEM personally and vote for him to walk off with the grand prize, who am I to complain?

I don’t agree with his tactics AT ALL – but I don’t agree with a lot of what I see on tv so why should this be any different?

in the end as much as his personality disgusted me, of the two that were left he DID deserve to win… you can’t be that despicable all the way to the final two and NOT walk away with the grand prize!!

just he fact that he was still there after all that crap HAD to count for something!!

soooooo congratulations Dick… you now have enough money for a lifetime supply of BEANO - with more than enough left over to correct your apparently over active saliva glands AND get some etiquette lessons!! WOO HOO

but hopefully NOT before your turn on AMAZING RACE!!

HaHa!! did you hear Julie last night during all the commotion as the show was ending?

so... are you guys ready for Amazing Race?

haaaa I AM!! and I’m not an AR fan but that is ONE season I would HAVE to see!!

sooooo summer is over… Big Brother is done and without even one days break before the start of the newest greatest most disturbing reality show idea to start… KID NATION begins tonight

is it sick that I half hope it turns into some kind of twisted lord of the flies situation? haaaa - just kidding

actually I saw a small clip of a couple of the kids talking about it and they say it was more like summer camp than anything else… I have mixed feelings about it but of course I WILL be watching it – I’ve been losing interest in Survivor the last couple seasons so it’ll be nice to have something new to get hooked on

ohhhh my DVR arrived yesterday and not a moment too soon – I’ve already recorded at least 10 hours worth of stuff and Sam has set it to record at least 5 more hours over the next week

that’s right – Mr. ‘I don’t care about TV’ got that remote in his hand and spent a solid hour scanning the channel guide for the entire weeks listings setting it to record everything in his path haaaa

I’m pretty psyched because now I’ll be able to record (and watch in the privacy of my solitude where nobody can pick on me) countless hours of my biggest guilty pleasure…

DRAKE & JOSH!!

yes I realize I’m 34 – but I can’t help it… those two crack me up!! that show is the best thing to hit Nickelodeon since the awesomely awful Canadian show FIFTEEN brought us our first glimpse of the then adorable... now total hottie - Ryan Reynolds

will I ever grow up? with my nifty new DVR it looks like we’ll never have to find out haaaa

my cat is weird!!!

sometimes I find her sitting under the shade of our living room lamp!
why? there’s no moth flitting around the bulb that she’s trying to catch - she’s just sitting there with her head under the shade… squinting because her eyeballs are literally two inches from the 60 watt bulb glaring in her face!!

(obviously you can't see her squinting... you'll have to take my word for it)

what the... does she think it’s a sun lamp? is she tanning? does she have seasonal affect disorder and she’s hoping the light will help cheer her up? is it just too cold in the house and she’s sitting where it’s warmest?

is she practicing her role as a lamp in some kind of far-out one cat play?

is she communicating with the cats from her home planet? maybe she thinks if she sits there long enough they'll beam her back...

seriously... I think she needs therapy!!

R.I.P.

so I’m a dork… I LOVE Big Brother!! what can I say… I’ve probably seen every episode of every season… that’s a lot of shows considering it’s on 3 times a week!! haaaa

for 8 seasons…

holy crap!! I think adds up to something like 11 full days out of my life!!

best not think about that huh?

anyway - a couple seasons ago Sam started getting into it too… which is cool… we don’t have too many shows that we both like to watch – so when he’s busy I tape the show so that we can watch it together… which obviously kills me!! especially this season!! this has to be THE best season of Big Brother EVER!!

and I have so little to look forward to... I don’t want to have to wait a minute longer than necessary to watch my beloved Big Brother… I’m spoiled like that hehehe

Tuesday night Sam was busy… Tuesday night of all nights!!
Tuesday morning I had read HERE that it had been seen through the live feed (stupid live feed!!) that Daniele won the veto (ensuring her father and herself spots in the final 3) this made it eat at me even more… I wanted to see if it was true!!

anyway… Wednesday night finally came and Sam FINALLY got home… my wait was over WOO HOO – or so I thought…

my vcr had been acting up a bit the day before (it has actually been acting up for a few months) – I thought it was in remission… and actually I thought (hoped) that this time it was the tapes… I thought (hoped) I accidentally screwed them up by hitting record repeatedly when I meant to hit rewind, but it wasn’t that - whatever it was made everything very jumpy and totally unwatchable… and using the head cleaner thingy didn’t help =(

so there I was with time and BB just waiting to be watched and my beloved VCR chooses NOW to die on me?!!

at least I think it’s dead… I hope it was dead… if it wasn’t dead it IS now!!

I stepped away to mourn… and pee and try to figure out a way to watch this freakin’ show that had been eating at me all day!!

I wasn’t gone 2 minutes before Sam had it laying on the autopsy table with it’s guts hanging out!!



what the hell??? are we SURE it wasn’t curable??!! GAH!!

~sigh R.I.P. old friend… you worked hard all your life... I wasn't easy on you!! there probably hasn't been another machine in the history of home video equipment that has played and recorded more movies and shows!! you will be missed

but not too much cause now I get to have my DVR - WOO HOO!! yes... after all that talk about saving money and whatnot... but I am a tv head!! and I've been wanting DVR for soooooooooo long!! if it made sense to buy another vcr I would... but VHS is dead - I've been banned from buying VHS tapes for over a year now - our DVD collection is growing and growing - it wouldn't make sense to buy a VCR just to be able to watch the few (200 give or take) movies I have on VHS

since many of my movies are currently out of print, we did have a spare VCR laying around that we had bought a while ago at a yard sale to transfer all my irreplaceable VHS to dvd (which STILL hasn’t gotten done) so my twitching has subsided… we WERE able to see the show – YAY!!

but the spare VCR doesn’t have a remote… so for now we’ve borrowed my mothers dvd/vcr combo thingy which as I mentioned a couple posts back, she never uses

that'll hold me over until my new cable box arrives... I'm like a little kid waiting for christmas over here!!

the countdown has begun!! my new cable box should be here sometime between Monday and Wednesday - just in time for the fall season to start!! WOO HOO!!

no more cuing up a tape... no more accidentally taping over something I haven't seen yet... no more bad picture quality caused by over use... no more being told I'm killing the play heads by rewinding or fast forwarding while the tape is playing... no more flipping A/B switches... no more having to choose which show I want to tape

now I'll be able to record two shows at once... up to 100 hours of glorious TV goodness... I'll be able to catch all those shows I miss or never get involved in because there's just too much to choose from!!

I've already lost track of prison break and still have never seen desparate housewives, heroes, brothers & sisters, grey's anatomy, ugly betty and who knows what else because they're on when I'm watching something else I'm already into and taping something else

AND I'll be able to tape digital channels... which I haven't been able to do on account of the digital can't be on while the VCR is in use

sooooo now when we're really bored and we need a laugh we'll be able to watch sex talk with Sue Johanson WOO HOO

Dear Sue,

I can't find my sister's G spot... will you help me find it?

signed,
Granny lover, Podunk Iowa

extra paycheck month....

for those of you unfamiliar with this poor mans joy – an extra paycheck month is a month that has 5 pay days instead of the usual 4

for example – if you get paid every Friday then you’re just coming off an extra paycheck month and are due for another in November, because August and November each have 5 Fridays

they come about four times a year – most people don’t seem to notice them… maybe because they make enough money to where it doesn’t REALLY matter or are in so much debt that they’re never quite ahead of the game anyway but those of us who aren’t quite poor enough to actually live paycheck to paycheck – those of us who live on a more month to month basis… with minimal debt *knock on wood* actually get excited by these ‘extra paycheck months’

we’re fortunate enough to know that our bills (including some small ‘luxury’ money) are covered by what comes in the usual 4 paychecks… so anything that comes in that 5th check is usually gravy… or as close to gravy as we can get… perhaps it’s more of an au jous

anyway it’s good for paying off minor extra debt (like a stray doctors bill or two) or for getting new tires or if say, your vacuum dies and you couldn’t otherwise afford a new one – stuff like that… the things I guess most people don’t worry too much about because they actually have some savings

WE are not particularly good at saving money… it’s hard because we don’t usually have much left over at the end of the month and because we usually have a use for that ‘extra’ paycheck we don’t get to stash it away in our savings like I would like to do!!

my ultimate goal would be to be able to actually stash 3 if not all 4 of those ‘extra’ paychecks in our saving account (or something) – since the usual four checks cover our regular bills with a little extra spending money leftover so we don’t feel too deprived – in our case that would mean being able to save up to $2,000 a year… obviously that is not a lot – but it beats the crap out of the $4.28 we currently have available in our savings account!!

part of the problem is that we see that money as some kind of reward or something… like WOO HOO we have extra money this month – lets live it up!!

by live it up I mean, each get our own $4 lunch special at China Cock

ok that may be a bit of an exaggeration… but we’re NOT very extravagant people – obviously my idea of a great evening out is burgers and a drive-in movie

anyway THANKFULLY more often than not we don’t have much in the way of extra bills or emergencies that need to be paid for… yet instead of stashing away a little buffer money incase the car breaks down during one of the other 8 months of the year where there is NOT an extra check coming in - we somehow seem to blow through that ‘extra’ paycheck… we usually find stuff we need or want – like this month… I’m on an exercise kick (I hope it lasts) and I miss my old exercise bike so we waited for the extra check and ordered a new recumbent bike – that ate up $200

add that to whatever other miscellaneous stuff we wind up doing – yard sales, flea markets, eating out because we’re not home from running errands in time to cook dinner etc. etc. etc. and before ya know it BAM the rest will be gone too

this wasn’t the direction I planned on going when I started writing this but now it is my goal to figure out a way to start socking that money away… or at the very least use it for something better… like put it toward the student loans!!
of course like I said our next extra paycheck month is November – which is a little too close to Christmas to try to save any money – but I think I’ll make that one of my goals for the new year

I watch these shows where some money expert is trying to show people how to get out of debt by cutting back their spending – and after I stop sighing with relief over the fact that we don’t really have any debt (compared to most people) I usually gasp at the things these people spend money on (what they call the latté factor) I’m always sure that we have NO room for savings because we don’t spend money on any of this stuff – we don’t eat out anywhere near as much as it seems most people do!! we probably spend between $15 and $20 on take out a week… and at that we usually get something that gives us each enough left over to have lunch the next day!! apparently a lot of people spend that much every day

I’m not willing to give it up… I think it’s just part of life… as long as we’re normal working people paying our bills on time and managing to keep a roof over our heads I feel like I deserve to not have to cook at least one meal a week!!
even if it does sometimes make me feel guilty

I do everything with a debit card and if I need cash I get cash back at the store for free instead of using a machine and paying a fee

I can count on one hand the number of times we buy something like a starbucks frappuccino in a year (even before we declared the ban on chain stores)

we don’t buy new clothes or shoes very often… I’m not the typical fashion conscious girl who needs to keep with the trends… or buy a new pair of shoes every week – in fact I don’t usually buy anything until my old stuff is beyond unwearable!!

Sam cuts his own hair and I haven’t had my hair cut by a professional in over 11 years!!

we don’t have car payments, cell phones, satellite radio, tivo or any fancy cable packages

we have a triple play deal with the cable, internet and phone that costs less than just the phone and internet alone would cost otherwise – especially since my best friend and my sister both moved out of state!! having that free long distance is very nice!!

basically my point is there is very little room to cut back

yet somehow even though we have these 4 extra paychecks ($2000) a year over and above the cost of our monthly expenses – the money ain’t there!! and for the most part I couldn’t produce the items or receipts to explain what we have to show for it!!

aside from the rare car emergency or unexpected trip to the doctor – or the even rarer bigger luxury… like my new bike - where the heck does it go?

I wonder if one of those money professionals could figure it out… heh if they can I can!!

my first plan will be to figure out a way to isolate everything over and above our regular monthly expenses – which is hard because even though we’re covered it’s still tight enough to where I worry we’ll find ourselves overdrawn at the end of the month if we’re slow to get the next check in the bank – but if we have $100 left at the end of a regular month, that money needs to be stuck in savings ASAP so we can make a note of what we wanted to do or buy, but didn’t because that money wasn’t available

I’m all for living today like it’s your last and all that but hopefully it won’t be and genetically we stand a chance at being around for at least another 30 years or so

so my main reason for wanting to save some money, aside from it being uncomfortable knowing that if something happened and we needed to move or buy a new car suddenly, we’d be pretty well screwed – is that without ANY saving how do we ever expect to buy a house some day… or for Sam to ever be able to stop working? he works hard and I don’t want him to have to do it every day until he dies!!

$2000 isn’t much money but we’ve had at least that much extra a year for the last 5 years or so… if we had been saving that all this time we’d have between $8,000 and $10,000 by now… give or take the random unexpected expense

we can’t go back in time but we’re still relatively young… if we start now maybe we can have SOMETHING in the bank to fall back on a few years from now…

your beep or mine?

first of all I guess I should say I’m not talking about YOU – I’m just venting and generalizing again - so no offense to you 50-somethings reading this… YOU are not who I’m talking about… you found your way here without written instructions and an assistant so I’m sure you’re NOT one of THEM hehehe

but WHAT is the deal with the rest of the 50+crowd??? is it when we hit 50 our brains stop understanding new things - is it just a generational thing or what? why is it that it seems like anyone over 50 can’t handle even the simplest things??

for example call waiting… I remember when it first came out (my grandmother was probably in her mid 50's) – of course she HAD to have it!! she had to have everything new!!

anyway… it never failed - EVERY single time I talked to her on the phone (which was pretty much every day!!) she would get a call on the other line, hear the little call waiting tone and ask… ‘is that your beep or mine?’

no matter how many times I told her IF YOU HEAR A BEEP it is YOURS!!

I realize when she was a kid people didn’t even have phones… they had to rely on carrier pigeons or the pony express or whatever but call waiting was new to me too!! just because I grew up with a phone shouldn’t really matter that much… should it??? we didn’t have beeps… hell we didn’t even have touch tone... or BUTTONS for that matter – I grew up with a rotary phone just like she had!! why was it so hard for her to understand the freakin’ beep of an incoming call??

for a while I thought it was just my grandma... she was a smart lady but maybe technology just wasn’t really her thing… not that it’s mine (AT ALL) but maybe growing up in the 70’s and 80’s did help somehow… I don’t know

but THEN it started happening with my mother!! I KNOW she grew up with a telephone!! she was 20 when I was born in 1973 so she was familiar with the telephone!! sure for a while there was probably only one phone in the house and it may have had a party line… and all you had to do was pick up the receiver and ask the operator to connect you to klondike 247 or something like that – but still the phone was nothing new to her!!

she was probably in her early 30’s when call waiting came along… and for years she seemed to manage it just fine – I never noticed her having a problem with it when I was a kid anyway… but now that she’s in her 50’s it seems like every time she gets another call it takes her 5 minutes to figure out IF it’s ‘her beep’ in the first place and then find the right button to push to click over to the other line… 9 times out of 10 she’s too late and the other person has either hung up or gotten her voice mail by the time she manages… meanwhile she’s clicked the wrong buttons and said hello to ME five times!!

now I notice this with all the 50-somethings (my aunts, mother in law etc.)

anyway apparently this issue with technology doesn’t stop with the telephone it’s a problem with the tv as well!! – I KNOW I’m kind of odd in that I can manage to program a vcr or set the clock or hook up the tv/dvd/cable/video games etc. – if I don’t know how, I can figure it out on my own… I really don’t understand people who can’t (or don’t bother trying) – but hey… whatever!!

my mother has one of those vcr/dvd combo do-dads that she got probably about 5 years ago which she has NEVER used… I think someone else hooked it up for her but didn’t set the clock so it has been blinking 12:00 for as long as it’s been plugged in!! if she had to be somewhere but didn’t want to miss a show she would ask me to tape it for her – seriously how difficult is it to program a vcr to record??

she’s had cable for as long as it’s been available in kittyville (about 15 years) there have been times where she needed a cable box and times where she didn’t - but she recently got one of these triple play deals – I talked her into getting the dvr service with it which meant she has to have a cable box now (but at least she can record her own stupid shows!! that she HAS managed to figure out - WOO HOO!!)

anyway… the other night we were getting some thunderstorms and the power kept going out – when it was all over and she turned her tv back on it wasn’t coming in very clear… everything was kinda wavy and fuzzy so she called to ask me if mine was that way… it wasn’t

which meant it wasn’t the cable… but she couldn’t figure out what it was

she’s pushing the buttons on the remote and all the channels look like crap – THEN she goes over and pushes the channel up button on her tv and VOILA ~ everything was clear!!

she was very confused!!

I explained to her that apparently her tv (like a lot of tv’s) jumps back to the beginning (channel 2) when the power goes out – so when she turned her tv back on it was no longer on channel 3

she was still confused

what had her confused was the fact that this didn’t work by using the remote!!

I said… look closely at the remote in your hand

did it come with your tv?

‘no’

that’s why it doesn’t change the channels on your TV!!!

GAH!!

seriously… this isn’t fucking rocket surgery!!

quote of the day...

I loved this!! - its from a book Sam was reading recently called TRACKINGS ~ a message for the third millennium

"The whole trend is deadening. Everything you need at the touch of a finger creates soft people with mush for minds, squeamish wills and jelly bellies. Each human power that isn’t used atrophies. Before we’ve even begun to tap the potential of our own bodies, we neglect them to run after virtual fantasies."

sad....

we had our friends over the other night… I’m sure I’ve told you about them before – he doesn’t quit seem to have his priorities in order and she’s a nagging shrew… neither Sam or I can figure out why they got married or why they STAY married (other than their kid)

they actually seem more like a divorced couple who live together – not even just roommates, but two people who don’t get along and don’t really have much in common

we get together with them pretty often because he is one of Sam’s oldest and closest friends (if it wasn’t for him, me and Sam probably would never have gotten together)

but we weren’t around for the first several years of their marriage because she wouldn’t let him see Sam

one day a year or two ago he put on his big boy boxers and said he was going to see Sam whether she liked it or not… and the rest if history I guess

they don’t exactly live around the corner but we get together with them a few times a month, either at their house or ours and it’s usually an all day affair – it’s VERY casual, much like family getting together… like a don’t bother putting on make-up kind of thing - so we get to really see how they interact with eachother…

he’s very into the outdoors, hunting, fishing etc. he’s been that way as long as I’ve known him – and I mean VERY!! any opportunity he gets he’s out there – to the point where it seems like he’s purposely avoiding being home – or he really just doesn’t care… it really seems to me like his ‘hobbies’ take priority over his marriage

I wonder what he thinks of Sam when he declines to do certain things because he’d rather be at home or when he’s in a hurry to get stuff done with the guys so that he can get back home – because this guy really doesn’t seem like he could care less about being at home other than to spend time with his kid

for the longest time I thought his wife was just a bitch… but the more I see the more I can understand how she might be frustrated by this – not that this is an excuse to be a bitch… I do think she just is naturally bitchy anyway – because I truly feel like there are better ways to make yourself heard than to treat your husband like a 4 year old (yes I know I’m guilty of it once in a while) but with her its CONSTANT!!

she tells him to do something and he doesn’t do it fast enough or to her liking and she jumps down his throat – as a result he doesn’t seem to want to do anything for her – I mean why would he, chances are he’ll just screw it up anyway

and to top it off she seems totally cold toward him… while we were over there a couple weeks ago he went to give her a kiss and she kinda pushed him away and rolled her eyes!!

can you imagine??!!

it seems like every chance she gets to bitch about him, she does!! some of it I think is valid… but the way she goes about dealing with it is just nuts!! and clearly doesn’t work!!

so anyway like I started saying 8 hours ago, they were over here for dinner the other night – and while the guys were outside doing their thing and we were inside getting dinner together she starts telling me about how when they first got together she told him flat out that she did NOT want to wear the pants in their relationship and that she did not want to be the breadwinner

I’m not sure why she would feel a need to stress that point with him - maybe that was an issue in her first marriage… I don’t know but I wouldn’t be surprised because she has a very domineering personality!!

I thought DEMANDING was an interesting way to go about making sure your husband wears the pants – but that is very much her way!!

I don’t know what the heck went on for the last 8 years before we re-entered the picture - but as far as I know she was pretty much a stay at home mom for most of the time – which means she was obviously NOT the breadwinner (until recently when he lost his job)

she went back to school a couple years ago and has been working full time for about the last year or so - other than that I’m pretty sure he was the one making all the money – he’s been laid off all summer and I guess she’s not thrilled with his housekeeping skills – and thinks he should be doing more

I guess she’s worried he’s enjoying his time off a little too much… which I can understand – but she REALLY seems to resent the fact that he seems to be enjoying his time while she’s at work a lot more than she enjoyed hers all those years while he was the one working – apparently he’s spending even more time working on his hobbies now

I asked her if she KNEW him before they got married… I’ve known him for close to 20 years and he’s always been obsessed with the outdoors and hunting etc.

she said he was young (she’s about 5 years older than him) and she figured he would mature some as they went along

HAAA

I told her that wasn’t very smart – it’s not a good idea to marry someone hoping that they’ll change!!

(any single people reading this… remember THAT!!)

anyway skip ahead a couple hours… we’re just about done eating dinner and it’s starting to get dark… I knew the guys wanted to be outside at that time to scan the field for deer so when he asked if I minded if they went outside for a few minutes I had no problem with it

he still had some salad on his plate…

he gets up and starts walking away… and she calls out ‘uh EXCUSE me?!’ and points to his plate… obviously trying to remind him to be a good boy and clear his plate from the table

he said he wasn’t done eating yet

so she says… ‘well then you better eat that when you come back in!!’

haaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I asked her how she ever expects him to wear the pants in the family if she’s always criticizing him and treating him like a 4 year old?

she said… ahh he’s never gonna do it anyway so what’s the point?

I can’t help but wonder what the hell she’s thinking!!

the next day was Monday… Sam and I were enjoying a nice relaxing lazy morning… we were just sitting out back on the picnic table bench not really saying much… just enjoying the fresh air and eachothers company… he would touch my hand or I would touch his leg – just like we always do

I wondered if this couple ever just sits like this and enjoys being together – because I think its times like these that are kinda the glue that helps keep it together, ya know

I can’t imagine feeling as distant as those two seem… just thinking about it makes me sad