filler...

I’m just plum out of things to say at the moment… I guess I’m just busy running over the to-do list in my mind and letting that take priority (for once) haaaa I’m in minimalist mode – that happens once in a while… I just want to remove any and all clutter from the house… so I’ve been working on that this week

so as usual when I have nothing else to say I thought I’d answer yet another of those nifty surveys which someone conveniently emailed to me earlier this week… so you can learn even more useless facts about dear old ME!!

I’ve probably already answered some of these… but if I don’t remember I doubt you do either haaaa

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?:
I don't think so...

2. WHAT COMES FIRST IN YOUR LIFE?:
my marriage

3. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?:
I dunno... a couple weeks ago maybe

4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? :
I used to... but I don't write very well anymore... my hands seem to prefer typing now haaaa

5. WHAT WAS THE FIRST CD YOU EVER BOUGHT? :
no clue… this was clearly written by a youngin haaaa - I know the first record I bought (which gives you some idea of how long ago that was! - I think I was 8 or 9) no idea what the first CD was though – first record (there were two at once actually) Ozzy Osbourne’s ‘Speak of the Devil’ and the Willy Wonka soundtrack

6. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? :
wunderbar bologna (the small one... sliced super thin!!) NO other bologna will do!!

7. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? :
no I don't have kids - everyone knows that

8. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? :
knowing what I know about me? not for long

9. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? :
never!

10. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? :
yes

11. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? :
hell no!! that would be like an elephant hanging itself with a rubber band

12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? :
cocoa pebbles!! YABBA DABBA DOO

13. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? :
not usually - I'm lucky I tie them when I put them on!! haaaa

14. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? :
I'm not the least bit strong in any sense of the word!!

15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? :
either Bryer's van/choc/straw OR ben & jerry's chunky monkey OR haagen daazs vanilla swiss almond

16. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? :
voice/hands

17. RED OR PINK? :
I like my blood red and my lemonade pink

18. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? :
MY least favorite thing or everyone elses? haaaa MINE is probably my verbal diarrhea

19. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? :
my niece

20. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? :
yes… but I know you won’t

21. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? :
black pants – black slippers with roses embroidered on top

22. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? :
leftover shepherds pie

23. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? :
Tom Waits - pasties and a g-string

24. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? :
pink on the outside - black on the inside OR maybe a nice caterpillar gut green

25. FAVORITE SMELLS? :
sautéed onions - roses - FALL

26. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? :
the spousal unit… he’s coming home early today WOO HOO!!

27. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? :
I love him like a brother

28. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? :
ick sports!!! if I have to pick one I'll say Roller Derby - what could be better than a bunch of chicks kicking the shit out of eachother??

29. HAIR COLOR? :
brown - but it's getting disturbingly less brown around the edges!!

30. EYE COLOR? :
brown

31. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? :
no

32. FAVORITE FOOD? :
hmmm depends on my mood - right now I feel like a blob and only want to eat salad and fresh fruit!! – but if I have to pick one I’d say POPCORN!!

33. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? :
SCARY MOVIES!! who doesn't know this about me??!!

34. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? :
last movie I watched OUT was Knocked Up - last movie I watched at home was some lifetime movie, I think

35. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? :
black

36. SUMMER OR WINTER? :
FALL haaaa

37. HUGS OR KISSES? :
hugs

38. FAVORITE DESSERT? :
oh I don't know... either tiramisu or strawberry rhubarb pie

39. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? :
none of you!!

40. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?:
all of you

41. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? :
reading??? I thought books were just there to keep dust from falling on the shelves... there are words in there??!!

42. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? :
stains!! it's probably 10 years old... I desperately need a new mouse pad!! but what's under the stains is Cartman "it's a bunch of tree hugging hippie crap"

43. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? :
american inventor

44. FAVORITE SOUND? :
tree frogs, breeze blowing through leaves - crows cawing – my niece laughing

45. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? :
BEATLES - hands down... the rolling stones suck big hairy monkey balls!!

46. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? :
Hawaii

47. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? :
not that I know of

48. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? :
Long Island

49. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW? :
hard to narrow it down… probably a tie between Criminal Minds, CSI, Lost, House, Jericho and The Riches

50. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? :
YOURS! even though I know you’re all big party poopers who never play along (even if you can just do it in my comments) hehehe

not much to say today…

I didn’t get much sleep this weekend but it was nice anyway… Friday night Sam didn’t get home from work until something like 10:30 – we were up talking for a couple hours after that and got up early the next morning so he could fix the brakes on the truck… which it turned out didn’t even need to be done, which was GREAT… but we got up early for nothing haaaa I REALLY could have used more sleep… I’ve been very sleepy the last week or so… I think it’s a PMS thing

Friday afternoon I even fell asleep for an hour… that NEVER happens unless I’m deathly ill haaaa

I’ve been itching to go to the drive-in (my favorite place on earth) since they opened for the season like 2 months ago… nothing particularly good has been playing at EITHER theater though… which is just as well since our stereo was broken anyway – that’s fixed now though and we HAD planned to go to the drive-in Friday night but obviously that didn’t happen… so we went Saturday night instead… they had Evan Almighty and Knocked Up

Evan Almighty was cute… probably not something I’d bother watching again… but Knocked Up was a fucking RIOT!! I laughed my ass off through almost the whole thing

as far as I know it was written, produced and directed by Judd Apatow – who also had a big hand in bringing us FREAKS and GEEKS… one of my all time FAVORITE shows… EVER!! if you’ve never seen it I highly recommend you get the dvd set – they took it off WAY before it’s time (like they do with all the really GREAT shows) so you can get the complete series for something like $45

it’s not your typical 90210 type high school piece of crap… if you went to school in the 70’s or 80’s you’ll recognize all the people that roam the halls in this TOTALLY AWESOME show – the stoners, cheerleaders, D&D geeks, the good kids… even the teachers and parents are awesome!! – the ‘main’ father is played by Joe Flaherty who could just stand on a stage and stare and I’d probably laugh my ass off!!

the soundtrack is awesome too!! Joan Jett, the Who, Rush, Jethro Tull, Queen, Warren Zevon etc.

you know I don’t spend money no how - but I waited in line for like 2 years in the rain and the cold to get my pre-ordered Freaks and Geeks dvd set!! haaaa

of course half the cast of Freaks and Geeks is in Knocked Up… which is cool… and made me want to go home and watch Freaks and Geeks!! (which I'm doing right now)

anyway… we didn't get home from the movies until close to 2 in the morning (the ONE drawback to going to the drive-in) I'm too old to stay up that late haaaa - you wait your whole life to be a grown up so you can stay up as late as you want... and then when you can, you just want to get some sleep!! what the hell??!! hehehe

we had to get up early again on Sunday too!! (I think I got about 9 hours of sleep all weekend!!) BUT it was worth it... Sam and his buddy fixed our plumbing problem and got my ‘new’ washer all hooked up – I’m so excited I could burst!! it took them half the day but it was worth it if you ask me hehehe now instead of having my hamper half full of stuff that I keep putting off because it won’t fit in the load and isn’t needed at the moment – like flannels and winter stuff that was floating around past the end of the season… I can actually get caught up on the laundry!! that will make me happy… any time I can avoid having stuff that I can see in my face every day hanging over my head waiting to be done it makes me happier – and things run more smoothly around here when I’m happier!! hehehe

oh well like I said… not much to say today – I just wanted to say SOMETHING...

sexy time… at the old folks home

once upon a time (the other day) after a long hard day of 'eating bon bons and watching my stories', I was relaxing in my big comfy chair when the spousal unit made it clear that he was a little wound up… so like a good little wifey I decided (he decided) I would help him unwind a bit… in the time honored way us women help our men unwind *wink wink*

now, my big comfy chair is a bit weird… and it was determined long ago that it is not a good place to perform this particular ummm… relaxation technique

so before things got too involved I told him we needed to move elsewhere…

just as we got to ‘elsewhere’ I thought ‘this could take a while… maybe I better go pee now!’

so I did…

when I got back I realized I was a little stuffed up… so I thought ‘I’m gonna need my nose to breathe… maybe I better blow my nose now!’

so I did…

as I was doing that, Sam wandered off… I asked ‘where the heck are ya going?’

he got to his destination and said: ‘to get my slippers… gotta have my slippers!’ - or something like that…

as he shuffled back to me in his slippers, with his fly down… all I could do was shake my head and wonder…

when the hell did we get so OLD??!!

**EDIT** it occurs to me that I forgot to mention that after a few laughs and old folk jokes - the spousal unit was EVENTUALLY properly unwound and a good time was had by all

so I may need Depends® and he may need a walker but hey... we still got it!!
sometimes we just need a little help getting it off the ground...

why…

before you all get your panties in a bunch I guess I’ll preface this by saying thank you for saying nice things about the little drawing I did for my niece – and I agree it’s cute and nice and I’m sure she’ll like it (or would if she wasn’t 3 and more interested in bubble wrap and flashlights) if it lasts I’m sure she’ll appreciate it when she’s my age haaaa

but as for drawing professionally… that’s sweet that you think I could (although I think you’re slightly nuts)

I don’t really see how something like that is even close to being an option – maybe it’s just that I lack the drive and determination… it’s definitely partly because I lack the skill and imagination!!

granted there are a lot of people out there with NO ability to draw anything (I’m not saying I have NONE) I’m just saying my drawings are nothing special… especially this particular one… hell any 7 year old can draw a 5 petalled daisy

there are thousands of REALLY talented people out there… I’m pretty sure it’s NOT just my lack of self confidence or my lack of training/education (although that doesn’t help) that makes me think I don’t compare… it’s just a fact

I think at one time I had the potential to be a real artist of some sort – when I was a kid I drew neat stuff all the time… wrote short stories and poems and did all sorts of creative stuff like that - but something happened along the way to cause my brain to kinda stop working right… to be all… fuzzy

it’s like I said a couple posts back… I have a constant sense of feedback in my head and a feeling like any and all thoughts and ideas zoom around in there like a bb ricocheting around the inside of a tin can

I have trouble visualizing even the simplest things – obviously I can conjure up an image or I guess I’d be a vegetable, but they don’t last more than a second – so my imagination and creativity suffer

it feels like a severe case of writers block if that makes any sense...

it’s very rare that I’m able to sit down and draw at all – when I do, things just flow smoothly… if I try to force it, I get NOTHING – which is why it took me over a month to draw that one picture – every time I sat down and thought about drawing, nothing would come out

finally one day the door half unlocked for a moment and I was able to sort of force that one out (which is why it’s nowhere near as polished as I would have liked) - but that door slams shut as quickly as it opens and I have no control over it

this is why I hated school so much… because I have such a hard time focusing (because of the ‘feedback’) I have a really hard time taking in information and retaining it - almost everything in life is extremely frustrating to me… so of course I’ve done my best to drown out the feedback and frustration by not doing anything – and avoiding thinking as much as possible

because a lot of the time if I actually sit down and think… it frustrates me so much that I just want to cry – because to me if feels somewhat like I imagine it would feel to be unable to communicate at all… only it’s just me I can’t communicate with… like everything is trapped inside my brain and everything has to be lined up just right for anything to come out… but the slightest movement and everything is rattling around again, looking for it’s one chance to break free

I guess it could be described like math… some people have the math gene and some do not… if you don’t get math, you REALLY don’t get math!! (I don’t get math and it frustrates the shit out of me because what he hell could be more simple than MATH!!??) math is what makes the world go ‘round – numbers are the key to everything and it’s like… almost as if it’s just too much to wrap your mind around, when actually it’s just very simple steps that lead to a solution

yet here I am… reasonably intelligent (I think) and I literally can NOT count back change or do math simple enough to make sure I’ve gotten the right change back – I understand the words when a cashier counts back my change to me – I get that this money she is handing me is the difference between the cost of the item and the amount I handed her – but hell if I know how she arrived at that – even though I KNOW how to subtract 5 from 20 – so if what I bought was $5 and I hand someone $20 they should give me $15 back… but I don’t get how they count it back in that way that almost nobody does anymore (I’d demonstrate but I don’t know how… I assume you all know what I’m talking about) – one day I got it for about a minute and was like… DUH!! How did I not understand that??!! – but then it flew out of my head again literally the very next minute!!

GAH! ok this isn’t making any sense either haaaa

aah I don’t really know how to explain it… all I can tell you is that it’s insanely frustrating!!

also… it’s not as if I have a clue as to how to go about becoming an illustrator (even a not so good one) so even if I had the ability to sit down and draw at the drop of a hat – I wouldn’t have any idea how to go about making money at it ‘fortunately’ that’s not exactly an issue since my ability to do anything creative is pretty intermittent

I hope this made some sense and explains a little, why I don’t get off my ass and draw for money or whatever…

because believe me… in a perfect world there is almost nothing I would like more than to make a living creating children’s books instead of just collecting them haaaa - when I was growing up… I always pictured myself being a housewife, cooking, cleaning, taking care of things… but in the same picture I was also writing/drawing books for kids – those two things are all I’ve ever wanted to do

at the moment I have a hard enough time keeping it together enough to be a half way decent housewife... or even just a wife for that matter haaaa

but this was not meant to be a self pity post… just an explanation so you guys would understand WHY I don’t follow all your wonderful advice and get rich & famous as an illustrator hehehe

aside from the part where he wishes for death (before you all freak out – I DO NO WANT TO BE DEAD!!) haaaa - this video probably explains how it feels to have my particular mind better than I can manage to get across

constipated...

I'm a little bit blocked... mentally

hopefully I'll be back tomorrow with a real post... but for now - this is for Brian (even though he can't see it) haaaaa

flower princess...

a few weeks ago I said I was gonna draw a picture for my niece... I FINALLY managed to do it, so I thought I'd share it with you guys...

you know the drill... give it the ol' clickeroo



it's supposed to be my niece in a patch of giant pink daisies (her flower on account of she's partially named after a type of pink daisy)
anyway I thought that would be a nicer way to close out the week than yesterdays whinefest

have a GREAT weekend!!

I have nothing to say…

N O T H I N G – which is why I haven’t been saying much (here anyway) I still seem to have plenty to say in comments, elsewhere - good thing the rest of you have something to say or I’d be forced to sit here in silence haaaa

I’m just gonna spew and see what comes out…

the weather has been GREAT this week… in my opinion… most people look at me like I’m nuts - apparently they like to sweat and squint and complain about the heat!! I, on the other hand much prefer cool, overcast days when I can do things outside without being miserably hot and sweaty and headachy from the heat and squinting

yes I know I could buy sunglasses… SHOULD buy sunglasses – I just can’t seem to bring myself to do it… sunglasses don’t block out the heat anyway!!

anyway… yesterday I got a bunch of sunflowers and pumpkins in the ground – better late than never, right? we’ll see what happens

if it was up to me I would either NOT have a garden at all or we’d buy plants – I hate dealing with seeds… all that germinating, planting, thinning and re-planting seems ridiculous to me… I know plants cost more… but I’m thinking it would come out even if you consider the number of seeds and seed packets which we’ve bought over the years and never planted!!

I guess I’m feeling a little whiny today hehehe – aah who am I kidding? I seem to feel a little whiny every day – which is kinda why I haven’t wanted to be here much…

I talked to my sister yesterday… she seems to be trying to get us to move to Arizona… I just don’t see that happening… as I mentioned I’m not a big fan of heat and bright sunny days – I reckon they have a lot of hot, bright, sunny days in Arizona

no matter how many times I tell her we can’t afford to move anywhere! let alone 2000 miles away to a place where we’d be unemployed and homeless!

just for shits and giggles I decided to check out the classified ads in the place she was suggesting we’d probably like (on account of it’s a little cooler and there are trees and lakes) because she said we could get an awesome place for about what we pay here… I don’t know what paper she is reading but I didn’t see anything for less than $250 more than we pay here and the majority of the places were closer to $500 more!! – which is EXACTLY how it is here… which is WHY we still rent from my crazy mother!!

as much as I would love to be closer to my niece (and I guess my obviously bat shit crazy sister too) I just don’t see us moving out there

I’ve been thinking of making a video to send to them so my niece will remember what the hell I look like… but I can’t think of anything to say

I’m having a bad time mentally lately… I have a hard time most of the time with my brain not working how I’d like… but I notice it a lot more when I want to do something and just feel blocked… which is the other reason I haven’t been here much… I just feel totally blank

I don’t feel depressed or anything (unless I start thinking too hard about my blank brain) - I just feel… like I have a wicked case of creativity block

I’m really starting to think I need medication if I’m going to continue to exist on this planet – it’s maddening feeling like you have oodles of stuff wanting to pour from your mind – writing, drawing, crafty stuff… ANYTHING and it’s all kinda on the tip of your tongue and being held back by massive amounts of feedback/fuzzy brain feeling

I’ve been this way all my life… which is why I did so badly in school and why I’m convinced I’m an idiot even though I know I’m not – but still something is obviously wrong with me

ok I seem to have lost my train of though… I guess that means I’m done hehehe

weekend update #6107

I don’t know about the rest of you, but nothing makes me and Sam appreciate being home… alone… together, more than being out and socializing!!

most of our weekends are pretty laid back… especially compared to some of you I’m sure – it occurs to me now that what we sometimes consider a hectic weekend really isn’t all that hectic at all… it seems the difference is actually one on one time together

usually what we consider a hectic weekend is one where we are running a lot of errands, grocery shopping and that sort of thing – where it’s just the two of us out and about getting stuff done – what makes us think it’s hectic is the fact that we’re not home watching movies or just ‘relaxing’ – but we ARE alone in the car, talking and just being together – we may not be relaxing but apparently we’re doing some kind of bonding that we don’t even notice

THIS weekend was NOT a typical semi-hectic weekend at all – the entire weekend we were pretty much only home long enough to sleep

Saturday – after we went grocery shopping we had plans to go over to a friend’s house so that he and Sam could install a new gas tank and new (to us) stereo, in our truck AND apparently they were also supposed to be deep frying a turkey and doing this whole big BBQ thing

the gas tank project didn’t go as smoothly as the men expected - I think they were the only ones surprised by that – the other wife and I were not the least bit surprised at how long the whole thing was taking – boys+tools+beer=slow

here they are hard at work…





I have no idea what they’re doing here… charades? interpretive dance? who knows…



obviously I played with my camera while I watched and waited to find out if this job was actually even doable

here is my interpretation of what childbirth looks like from the baby's perspective



and here they are FINALLY getting some work done… you can tell how our gas tank might have been a little rusty... it looks like they SHOULD be replacing the whole ass end of the truck!! haaaa (that probably would have been quicker)



believe it or not I actually had faith that they could get this done… and they did… FINALLY!! (about 8 hours later!!)

since the whole car project took about 5 hours longer than the (very optimistic) guys thought it would, they wound up getting pizza and putting off the big turkey fry/BBQ until the next day… even though all we wanted to do the next day was… NOTHING, since it was a project on OUR truck that caused them to postpone the thing, we kind of felt obligated to show up and help them eat the mountains of food they had (one 12 pound turkey, two whole turkey breasts, 10 burgers, a dozen hot dogs, potato & macaroni salad and corn on the cob) for 5 adults and one 8 year old!!! who the hell can eat that much??!! I mean I can EAT but not THAT much!!

so instead of a nice relaxing Sunday of snuggles and movies and peace & quiet – there was more socializing… only this time instead of watching 3 men work on a car, it was 3 men standing over an outdoor deep fryer drooling over a turkey like a bunch of cave men hehehe – it was entertaining, watching them try to figure out the logistics of it all… where to put the fryer, how to lower the bird in, making a better turkey dunking contraption than the one that comes with the fryer, calculating time and oil displacement

of course I often wind up sitting on the sidelines with this guy’s wife (the couple who’s house we were at) and I swear she is enough to make any man never want to get married!! ALL she ever seems to do is bitch and complain, roll her eyes and shake her head and talk to the guy like he’s a 4 year old

don't get me wrong, I realize men and women are different and have different ideas about how to get the same job done... and sometimes the way men do things, makes me crazy too... and I can shake my head and roll my eyes with the best of them... but this chick is in a class all her own!!

at one point I found myself running this scene over in my head where her husband finally gets fed up with her attitude and straps her to their turkey dunking contraption and deep fries her!! but I could imagine afterward, her crispy head on the table still shaking side to side with eyes rolling at him haaaa

picture this:



with the head of a bitchy, domineering wife on top!!

it was amusing to me anyway haaaa

anyway... after we FINALLY got some food in our bellies we went upstairs for dessert which I made, so obviously it was awesome!! haaaa - and we watched Hannibal Rising

YAY!! FINALLY a movie… WOO HOO and I REALLY liked it too… although I am a little confused as to how a little Lithuanian boy, who winds up in France and then eventually goes to college in the U.S. ends up with an English accent by the time Silence of the Lambs rolls around...

anyway… by the time we finally got home on Sunday night (about 11pm) we both felt like we hardly saw eachother all weekend… and we missed our time together… even if all we do is nothing!!

it’s good to get out and be amongst other people once in a while but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing… although in a way all that socializing kinda brings us closer together because it helps us realize how much we really like being together… just the two of us… AND in this case, how grateful we are for the fact that we’re NOT them haaaa

**NOTE** I try to live by the rule of not saying anything about anyone that you wouldn't want them to hear... so I considered leaving the bitchy wife bits out of this, especially in a post full of pictures - because I wouldn't want them to think I don't like them... I actually DO like this couple and enjoy spending time with them... usually - but if she's not aware of the fact that she's overbearing then I don't reckon it matters, even if I am mostly kidding haaaa

I thought about it and decided that for the most part I really didn't say anything here that I wouldn't say in person... because I'm a bitch like that!! so it stays...

broken pipe dreams....

like that title? I stole it from one of the contestants of ‘on the lot’ last night – cause I’m a loser like that… nope I can’t even come up with my own post titles anymore!!

first of all I just have to say… it’s totally FREEZING here this morning!!
I think my thermometer said something like 48º when I woke up… so I guess it’s not TECHNICALLY freezing… but right now my extremities don’t seem to know the difference, as they’re all growing icicles and about to snap off – but there’s no way I’m turning on the heat in JUNE!!!

anyway… moving on

I should have known better than to get my hopes up about something in this god forsaken dump we live in!! it seems I may not have my own washing machine after all on account of my mother being a big fat poop stain!!

Sam did some investigating into the messed up plumbing situation we have here and discovered that the pipes leading to the only place we can put a washing machine have been cut off about 10 yards from the room they come out into.

apparently during a time between tenants, a winter went by where the place was empty and she didn’t bother to drain the pipes (something you have to do in cold climates if you don’t want them to freeze and burst) which of course they did… sometime about 5 years ago

now it seems installing this machine may be a lot more involved and costly than we had anticipated… I don’t really know where that leaves us

needless to say, I’m NOT a happy camper right now!!

and I feel bad because last night when we discovered this information I got kinda pissy and possibly took it out on Sam… who is only trying to do something nice for me… I’m not mad at him though, I’m mad at the situation… and MY MOTHER for once again not taking care of things which are once again interfering with my well being!!

note to self: must remember mom is a big turd who you can only trust to be unreliable and screw things up in any way possible!!

anyway as it stands right now it looks like I really won’t have my very own washing machine until hell freezes over… which (on the bright side) judging by the thermometer, might actually be sooner than I think…

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO US…

this weekend was our anniversary… 11 years – WOO HOO

we had originally planned on going to the movies (an anniversary tradition) and out to this little Indian restaurant we love but save for special occasions because we never want to spend the money – it’s not particularly expensive but we are particularly cheap

anyway… the restaurant is about 30 minutes off in a direction that we never find ourselves in… gas costing what it does I have a hard time going anywhere unless we can consolidate and get a few things done in one trip - which is why it’s cool to combine going out to eat (especially there) with something like a trip to the movies since there is a theater around the corner from the place

unfortunately this weekend there was nothing playing there that we were willing to see… I REALLY want to see knocked up but Sam won’t go see a comedy in a theater – he gets downright irate if people laugh ‘too long’ and cause him to miss the next line haaaa – he also hates seeing movies on their opening weekends because the theaters are too full… I’m totally with him there!! I way prefer seeing movies at off hours or on off days when there are very few people in the theater – that is one of the reasons I LOVE the drive-in so much

which is where we were hoping to go but our car stereo is broken and we’re waiting for our new speakers to arrive – maybe next weekend

instead we decided to stay home and watch ‘on demand’ movies and get pizza
and told ourselves that next time we’re out in the direction of the indian place and we want to go, we WILL

it was a pretty laid back weekend… it was too damn hot to do much outside but we did manage to get SOME yard work done… he sorted out our very neglected, overgrown, tangled up honeysuckle and we got rid of some weeds…

we made a trip out to home depot, looking for some garden stakes and other assorted crap and came across these nifty straps (in case you didn’t know… home depot is a bondage lovers paradise)
they have everything you could ever need for way cheaper than if you tried to buy actual ‘bondage’ gear – it may not be as pretty but it gets the job done… and like I said we’re cheap like that… I don’t care what the stuff looks like as long as it works haaaa

so of course we had to try them out… and I have to say if you’re into wrist restraints they’re actually very comfortable (I thought so anyway) I usually find my circulation being cut off way beyond what I’m comfortable with to the point where I’m getting distracted out of where my mind wants to be (which is NOT good) and wiggling trying to get feeling back in my hands, and these didn’t do that at all!!

plus if you accidentally leave them out where people might see them, nobody would ever suspect a thing about what you ACTUALLY use them for haaaa

they come in a few different sizes that would be suitable for other parts, such as necks and ankles as well

we also got ourselves one of them fancy highfalutin toilet seats made of genuine wood with real metal hinges – as opposed to the stupid $4 plastic piece of junk we got when we moved in here right after a single guy who was always throwing wild parties, and I INSISTED on getting a new toilet seat!! (I wanted a whole new toilet but Sam put his foot down)

now we can relieve ourselves in style – woo hoo hehehe

anyway… we did wind up doing our traditional anniversary double feature – we rented The Pursuit of Happyness and I was glad to find out there was a reason why happiness is spelled wrong – phew!! ya never know anymore the way the language is being altered and butchered all over the place, ya know? hehehe

anyway I knew how it was going to turn out because I saw the guy who it was about, on Oprah – I HATE seeing shows about movies… it’s almost always before I’ve gotten to see the movie and I hate knowing anything before going in – things always wind up being spoiled for me… but I wanted to see it anyway because I love stories about people who overcome what seem like impossible odds

we also watched Running With Scissors - another story of someone overcoming what seem like impossible odds… holy shit what a bunch of fucking nut bags! seeing movies based on books doesn’t usually make me want to read the book – but in this case I’ll make an exception… I’d love to see how this story is supposed to be told, as opposed to how they made it look for the movie – which I thought was great (Sam didn’t like it… which I think is odd) we’re both pretty into that kind of odd off the wall stuff

anyway… we saw another movie this weekend (I think) but I can’t seem to remember what the heck it was… hmmm

what else did we do?

I made Sam his favorite… chocolate chip cookies - thank god for AC!! otherwise no cooking of any sort would have been done!! it was one of those weekends where all you wanna do is sit inside and stay cool… it was so hot and muggy, just going out to get the mail would make you miserable haaaa

regardless of the yucky weather, we HAD to go grocery shopping yesterday (or I would have had to spend another LONG day going with my mother later this week)

I’m so glad we went because the most super awesome amazing thing happened on the way to the store… we came upon a flea market/yard sale type thing at a fire house – we decided to stop in there quick and see what we’d see… and within a minute my eyes zeroed in on this bright shiny WASHING MACHINE!!

I know I wrote last week or so about my new clothes line and how excited I am to not have to dry our clothes over at my mothers anymore… well I still have to wash them over there – which SUCKS!!

I’ve wanted my own washer & dryer and/or clothesline for EVER!!! I bug everyone about it ALL the time… I’m always telling everyone to keep their eyes out for a decent looking used washing machine – I would have even settled for one of those little ones that you hook up to the kitchen sink… we just can’t afford a new machine and I want to be able to wash the laundry when I WANT!! if the cat pukes on a blanket at 10pm I want to be able to wash it right then instead of having to wait until it’s convenient for someone else… I don’t think that’s so much to ask

I know in the grand scheme of things this isn’t a major issue… and it could be worse… I could be stuck back having to go to the dreaded laundromat!! having my own machine would just make my life that much easier and more pleasant and when my life is easier and more pleasant I am easier and more pleasant!! haaa

anyway the machine was $25 and it looks like they took pretty good care of it – he mentioned some pretty major part having just been replaced and all the wiring and stuff looked band new – he said that the only reason he was selling it was because when that part went, his wife took it as a sign to go out and get one of those fancy new pretty colored front loading machines (even though he just got the stupid old machine fixed) I can buy that story… sounds like something a chick would do hehehe

he said it was about 7 years old… and I know my mother’s machine is close to 20 years old – so hopefully it’ll last long enough to get our $25 worth – for $25 I’d be happy if the thing last a year haaaa

now I just have to get it out of the middle of the floor and into it’s new home – which unfortunately has to be our bedroom on account of we don’t have room anywhere else and since our bedroom was a kitchen originally, there is already plumbing in there – but I don’t care if the thing has to be set up in my damn living room as long as it works and I can do laundry when it’s convenient for ME!! haaaa

all in all it was a pretty nice anniversary weekend and a pretty good year!! - I think I’ll stick around for another =)

boredom...

I was bored last night… like REALLY bored!! for a tv head like me, this time of year sucks!! all the good shows have ended but the summer ones haven’t started yet… I think this is why shows like Big Brother are such hits… there’s NOTHING else on and by the time they start we’re desperate for anything new!!

anyway when I get bored I have a bad habit of pestering my poor husband… who at this point is about ready to lose his mind from the lack of sex around here lately – he was sitting here doing whatever it is he does in computer land… zoning out on the bass forum or window shopping for guitars… still checking prices on car stereo speakers even though he just FINALLY bought a set (I guess he likes to make sure he got a good deal even after the fact so that when he finds a better deal he can properly kick himself in the ass)

anyway… as I said I was bored so I plopped down in the chair next to him - which I know bugs him to no end… he hates when I’m ‘over his shoulder’ like that… which makes me wonder what he’s up to all the more hehehe – if I didn’t hate having him over my shoulder too, I might actually worry haaaa

once in a while I come across something funny or gross during the course of my adventures in blogland, that I want to share with him…

yesterday was one of those days… I learned through Jocelyn’s blog (if you didn’t see it, go here) that now... as if botox, nose jobs, face lifts, implants and brazilian waxes aren't enough... chicks are actually paying money to voluntarily have cosmetic surgery on their genitals!!! I was telling Sam about this while I was getting dinner together… and was relieved to get confirmation that he’s perfectly happy with my labia… regardless of the fact that I’m slightly uneven haaaa
everything about me is somewhat off kilter so why should THAT be any different?!

anyway Jocelyn was kind enough to add visuals to her presentation by means of a web site called the vulva gallery which has nothing but pictures of female genitalia of all shapes and sizes

because I was bored out of my skull and because I know my poor husband is about to lose his mind due to the extreme lack of sex and because I know how fond he is of female genitalia… and because I’m a bitch like that, I thought it would be fun to show him this ‘vulva gallery’

I was right… it WAS fun!! he marveled at how totally different each one really was from the last (as if he hasn’t seen countless hours of various porno twat over the years)

we sat there for quite a while gazing at (critiquing) one snatch after another and after a while it was as if they were clouds forming shapes in the sky… there were a couple that strangely enough we BOTH immediately saw the same images in… (we do that a lot on account of we kinda share a brain)

anyway I thought I’d share them with you…

first there was Beaker - looking at it you can almost hear it making that little muppety meep meep sound

then there was the eye of sauron - kinda scary the way it stares back at you, isn’t it? hehehe

a couple other interesting ones:

the pig snout

too much red bull

and last but not least… the venus fly trap

I told you I was bored!! haaaa

alright… that is quite enough pussy for one day!! now on to this weeks (not so) TOTALLY AWESOME VIDEO



have a GREAT weekend, everyone!!