trouble in kittyville....

a phone call I received yesterday around 4:30pm

me: hello
her: hi this is Angela from County Works, could I please speak to Sam?
Me: uh… he’s not home, can I take a message?
Her: well if he could just call me back… do you think he’ll be home by 5?
Me: uh I have no idea… who are you again??
Her: Angela from County Works he was here this afternoon
Me: is this where he works?
Her: no he works at ACME Trucking Company
Me: ~thinking I know where he works - oh I thought you might be a division of them or something (because he still has a little training junk and paperwork stuff to do) ….Who ARE you??
Her: I’m calling to schedule an appointment for him, he left here about 10 minutes ago, do you think he’ll be home before 5?
Me: uh I have no idea where you are so I have no idea how long it would take him to get home from there… or if he was even coming straight home
Her: ok well if he’s not he can call here at 8 tomorrow morning ok?
Me: still baffled by this odd conversation…. Umm ok… well no wait he’ll be at work by then.
Her: uh no I don’t think so!
Me: WHAT? WHY?!?!
Her: well I really can’t discuss it ma’am
Me: what do you mean you can’t discuss it??!!
Her: well this is a doctors office, we can’t discuss our patients
Me: well I’m his wife (and I’m about to have a fucking stroke so you better start talking lady!!) Is he OK?!?!?
Her: oh yes he’s fine, he was injured at work today and we need to schedule his physical therapy

Ok throbbing vein in my head subsiding now…. thinking more rationally

Me: where are you again?
Her: Hooterville
Me: he left there 10 minutes ago? – there’s a chance he could be home by 5 then if he is I’ll have him call otherwise he’ll call in the morning… (thanks for trying to kill me!! have a nice day!!)

I hang up and start thinking…. injured at work?!?! I start biting my nails not knowing what the hell happened to my poor husband. Finally about 30 minutes later, he shuffles into the house with his arm in a sling!! Toting prescriptions for hydrocodone, some kind of muscle relaxer and 500mg naproxen (aleve) looking like he just fell off the back of a garbage truck!!

Now about 5 years ago I sprained my knee so bad I couldn’t walk for over 2 weeks and they told me to take motrin – they gave me NOTHING for the blinding, mind numbing, excruciating, dry heave inducing pain I was in so I’m thinking he must be way worse off!!

He’s clearly in pain but now that we’ve had a chance to calm down and evaluate the situation, he doesn’t look that bad to me – as we were going to bed he told me the doctor said he needs to do ice/heat/ice, take his medicine and get plenty of hummers!!

When I sprained my knee, if you so much as breathed too heavy within 5 feet of me I would cry, so I said if he can think about sex he must not be too bad off.

His response: I could still do it even if I just had a limb blown off! (or something like that)

Men are funny funny creatures!!

So anyway…. as it stands right now we have no idea when he can go back to work or really what is actually wrong with his shoulder & neck. So I’m a little concerned about things right now, between him being hurt, needing physical therapy etc. – workers comp will pay for it but that doesn’t help the financial situation of him missing days of work etc. – at least not in a timely manner…. So I guess we’ll see what happens.

Keep your fingers crossed!!

weekend update....

Well this was the first actual weekend that Sam has had off in over a year! Until now it was Mondays & Tuesdays. People would always react as if it was some horrible injustice when they heard he didn’t have the actual weekends off. I’ve always said it doesn’t matter to me, which two days he has off as long as they’re consecutive!

You never feel like you can rest if you don’t get two days off in a row and even though people in this country don’t seem to think rest and relaxation are all that important, they ARE essential!! If you have errands to run, the smart thing to do would be to get them out of the way on day one so you can take day two to just veg! But if your days off are split up you are much more likely to run around doing stuff on both days – we’ve had his days off in pretty much all possible combinations including NO days off and EVERY day off – BOTH of those last two SUCK after a while!!

So how did I enjoy the FREE Saturday/Sunday as opposed to Monday/Tuesday?

It’s hard to tell, as this was an abnormally busy weekend. The county fair was this past week (ending Sunday), which brings A LOT of traffic into the whole area (it took Sam over an hour to get home from work Friday night when it should normally take about 30 minutes!) I was just starting to worry about him when he finally pulled in just before 7pm!!

So it took longer to get anywhere or do anything because of the extra congestion. We’ll get a fairer idea of whether we want to venture out on his days off next weekend when we can go out and see how many people are actually out and about on a normal weekend these days.

My current feeling on the pros and cons of NON-weekend days off:

pro – there are A LOT fewer people out on mon. & tues. – A LOT!!
pro – you have a MUCH better chance of finding a table or a comfy chair at Barnes & Noble on a weekday!! And the line to get our grande mocha frappuccino and chocolate chunk cookie is almost non-existent.
pro – the supermarket sales are just starting, so chances are they still have everything you want – and the lines are shorter!!
Pro - If you did want to go to the beach or something there is next to no one there
Pro – not many other people are around to bug you – the phone rings less – etc.

Con – you tend to miss out on weekend activities such as festivals or barbecues

Pros and cons of having the actual weekends days off:

Pro – on the off chance that you actually want to go to that friend’s barbecue you probably can
Pro – festivals, flea markets, yard sales etc. WOO HOO!!!

Con – there is more traffic and more idiots who don’t know how to drive!!
Con – there are more bicyclists riding side by side in the middle of the ‘quaint country road’
Con – the people you run into are ruder and in more of a hurry (so much for a relaxing weekend in the country)
Con – you probably have no real excuse for not going to that barbecue!
Con – you might as well not even waste your time trying to hang out at Barnes & Noble!! L and even if you try they’ll probably be all out of chocolate chunk cookies!!
Con – they raise the price of gas on the weekend!!

So as it stands right now weekdays are winning out for me!

Another thing is…. If you decide to go to that county fair it is MUCH nicer on the Tuesday than on Saturday!! There are far too many people there on the weekend!!

But we went anyway… luckily my sister knows someone so we had two free tickets, which saved us $24!! Actually not really because we never would have gone if we would have had to pay to get in!!

If you get in for free you feel like no matter what you do there you’re getting your moneys worth. We didn’t do too much…. We looked around at a bunch of goofy stuff, ran into my mother who was working there for the week. (She’s been unemployed for 9 months and saw this as her only chance to maybe put some oil in her tank so she wouldn’t freeze to death this winter) but the story of her week selling ride tickets at the county fair is a whole other post in itself!

We didn’t even really eat much… I usually set out to gorge myself on all the super yummy delicious artery-clogging, stroke inducing goodness that the fair has to offer. BUT this year I guess I just wasn’t all that hungry… in fact all I really ate was fruits and veggies while we were there.

We split a thing of tempura veggies and as we were leaving I got myself a frozen banana

Ahh where else can you get batter dipped deep fried vegetables, wash it down with the worlds largest lemonade and chase it with a giant CHOCOLATE dipped banana rolled in nuts?!?!

Now THAT is my idea of getting a full serving of fruits and vegetables!!

In the end I didn’t feel totally disgusting, I would normally have at least added to that, fried dough and possibly some kettle corn. And then I would have at least TRIED to take a big ol’ box of fudge home with me!!

BUT I know I’m gonna be at a flea market in the next few weeks where I can get fried dough… why eat all your horrible food in one day when you can spread the calories out? hehehe plus I can make my own kettle corn and fudge so why pay through the nose for them?? Just for the atmosphere? Sorry but I can create my own atmosphere for next to nothing thank you!

Sam was gonna buy me one of those nifty t-shirts with the old style iron on transfers that were so popular in the 70’s & 80’s – it was sooooo cute and totally ME…. it had two owls (I collect owls) on the chest and underneath them it said ‘NICE HOOTERS’ haaaaaaa but they were all out of that one of course!!

He DID get me a super duper SLICE-O-MATIC it slices it dices it juliennes it even does windows!! Ok well not really but it is super cool and since I can’t afford an actual stainless steel mandolin this is the next best thing. As soon as I got it home I grabbed a potato and started slicing – I can’t wait to make some potato chips or something!! I know I’m a weirdo – not too many people get all excited about goofy kitchen gadgets

So then it was a double fun day because after the fair we went to the drive-in!!
Have I mentioned how much I LOVE the drive-in? When I get rich some day I plan on making it my mission to restore as many old drive-in theaters as possible. Or at the very least have one really awesome one!!

We stopped off on the way and picked up a pizza, some wings, garlic knots and a 2 liter of orange soda – it all comes in this neat dinner deal thingy and it’s soooo yummy!! I feel bad about not getting food there but last time I went I got a big ol’ popcorn and a soda so I guess it’s ok!

Anyway the place was PACKED!! They were going around asking people to park better so they could fit more cars in so that’s cool. I was really glad to see it so busy, especially on a full price night and during fair week no less!! But they had a particularly good double feature going on…. Wedding Crashers and The 40 Year Old Virgin
they were both hysterical but I think Wedding Crashers was funnier… Sam said his throat hurt he was laughing so much!! I highly recommend both if you like stupid, mindless, sex related humor!! hehehe

We had a really good time…. and what did it cost us for all that fun & all that food?

A trip to the fair *ching* – tempura veggies *ching* – 2 large lemonades *ching* – a frozen banana *ching* – my super duper slice-o-matic *ching* – one large pizza *ching* – 20 wings *ching* – 8 garlic knots *ching* – a two liter of soda *ching* and TWO movies *ching ching*

The grand total - $82

So it’s true – two people can go out all day and half the night, have all kinds of fun, laugh their asses off and eat till they can’t eat no mo’ for less than $100!!!

PLUS we both had pizza and wings for lunch yesterday and pizza for breakfast today!!
You just can’t beat that deal!!

After all that big fun we just wanted to stay home and veg yesterday so that’s exactly what we did…. We slept in, I made us bacon & eggs – hey we gotta do something with all the eggs those tick eaters are laying!! And we lounged out in the peace and quiet ALL DAY LONG!!

All in all it was a really nice weekend!! :)

Oh and by the way… the ban has been lifted!!

awake.... barely

It’s a few minutes after 6 and I’ve been up for about 2½ hours. What little light I can see coming through where the cat opened the curtain, looks reddish. Isn’t that supposed to mean bad weather?

What is that little poem?

Red sky at night… something something
Red sky in morning something something warning?

~sigh.... more proof that you should never try to be poetic before the sun is up!!

Anyway this is day two of Sam’s new job…. Yesterday he had to get up at 5:30 and I thought THAT was bad!! haaaa today he had to get up at 4:30!!! Uh hello is it even legal to leave for work while it’s still dark out?

Well it shouldn’t be!!

I stepped outside to kiss him goodbye and I found myself looking up at the moon and stars…. It was actually kinda nice though. I love that time of day!!

Now that the sun is mostly up, all the sane people are driving to work cutting into the peace and quiet of the really early morning. It’s an odd time of day… the moon is gone now and people are hurrying around scrounging for change in their ashtrays for a cup of coffee, listening to some goofy morning show on the radio, putting on their mascara in the rear view, rushing to get to work somewhere close to on time. Meanwhile the crickets are still chirping away completely unaware that it’s not night anymore.

I tend to pay a lot of attention to how the little wild creatures behave…. If geese are flying south, summer is ending – if I see a robin, winter is ending – if there are a lot of birds at my feeder at odd times of day it’s probably gonna snow… if cows are laying down, it’s probably gonna rain (ok ok that one is debatable) hehehe BUT if crickets are still chirping incessantly, it’s TOO early to be hurrying anywhere!!

I may complain from time to time for having to be up at what most people refer to as ‘the butt crack of dawn’ but if I stop and think about it I actually feel extremely fortunate to have this time to just sit and relax!

Once upon a time I used to wake up with horrible migraines around the same time I woke up today…. I would make myself a big cup of tea, grab a notebook or a sketch pad and head outside as soon as it was light enough to not trip over a rock and just sit at this big picnic table under a huge blue spruce, slowly watching as all the little critters emerged from their nests.

At first it was almost disturbingly silent but it didn’t take long before all the birds started to get up for the day, singing their little songs, flicking around looking for worms. Then the deer would come out of the woods looking for their leafy breakfasts. If I sat still enough they would sometimes get almost close enough to pet…. almost hehehe

well.... some time has passed and the crickets have gone silent. I think I’ll make myself a cup of tea and go out back to enjoy what’s left of the peace and quiet before the hurriedness of the day begins. It’s been too long since I allowed myself some serenity…. Looks like I’ll need a sweater!! It’s around 45º for the second day in a row. I think I just heard some geese…. Woo Hoo!! Fall is coming!!

inspiration....

This started out as a comment on Dan’s post about the new show Rock Star: INXS but instead I’m posting my thoughts here because I’ve actually resisted the urge to blog about this piece of crap for long enough.

the first time I saw an advertisement for this show I almost fell off my chair - I didn't know if I should laugh or puke!!

I had a huge crush on Michael Hutchence once upon a time and was big into INXS - I was a kid - it was the 80's what can I say? hehehe

But the idea of this show is disturbing to me for some reason….

It’s hosted by Dave Navarro (formerly of Jane's Addiction) and Brooke Burke (some half naked twit... seriously - if she bent over you'd be able to see her tampon string hanging down below her hemline!!) I’m sure they only have them there to lure the youngsters who would otherwise have no idea who the hell INXS are/were whatever.

Of course I’m so out of touch I have NO idea who that Brooke chick is!! haaaa but maybe for the finale they'll air a 3-way between her, Carmen Electra & Dave Navarro!!

Anyway if you’ve never seen it the idea is that they take a bunch of rock singers and have them compete by singing popular rock songs for a chance to front INXS, make an album with them and go on tour. At the end of the week the three people with the lowest votes each have to ‘sing for survival’ an INXS song of the band’s choosing.

Then the band decides which of the ‘bottom 3’ has to go…. I roll my eyes every time they say, "you’re just not right for our band - INXS"

Are they required to announce the name of the band a certain number of times per episode? This line had to have been written by the same guy who came up with “the tribe has spoken, please bring me your torch” just once I would love to see one of those twits ‘accidentally’ trip over a rock in the ‘tribal council area’ and take out one of Jeff’s eyes with their stupid torch!!

Anyway you’re right, the booted rocker of the week is NOT right for your band INXS the only person who WAS right for your band INXS was found limp & blue hanging from a doorknob with his dick in his hand!!

I keep wondering what the next version of Rock Star: will be....

Maybe once Keith Richards is done decomposing and finally heads for that big methadone clinic in the sky they can televise the search for his replacement?! I’m sure Mick and the rest of their geriatric band would welcome the chance at yet another lame excuse for a tour.

Rock Star: Rolling Stones sponsored by Metamucil…. now less gritty tasting!! and Ed’s Oatmeal Shack… come and gum our early bird specials - while you’re here don’t forget to try a glass of our fresh squeezed prune juice!!

It will air right after the new show ‘Courtney Love Gets Sober’

Oh I’m sorry I believe its Courtney Love-Cobain now, last I noticed she was hyphenated! Is she trying to make us puke!! Weren’t they divorced or at the very least estranged when he died?? Yes Courtney we all see you there, how could we miss you? And yes we pity you with your dead ex, your track marks and your fresh out of the dumpster look…. Now would you please close your fucking legs before your mutated, airborne strain of hepatitis kills us all?!?!

Your daughter must be SO proud!!

Obviously neither show will ever air as crack whore Courtney will likely never get sober and Keith Richards will probably be left to roam the earth for all eternity living on a steady diet of cockroaches once they both become the only living creatures to survive the apocalypse!!

Airing Fall 2057 Rock Star: the next generation - watch as Keith Richards (the only living human being) serves as judge, jury and host while 13 hopeful cockroaches compete for a chance to tour with the relic himself!!

So what if there’s nobody left to watch it…. nobody watches now – nobody that will admit to it anyway!! hehehe

GO MIG!!!!!

feeling blah.... and uninspired

Sam had the last two days off and I hardly saw him at all. Monday he was running around trying to square away this hazmat junk and we discovered that it’s gonna cost about $150 for the pleasure of adding that little thing to his license!! Apparently it used to cost $10 but thanks to the fucking terrorists or whoever you now have to have some kind of homeland security check, be finger printed and the whole shebang!!

Add that to the new boots he needs and that’s about $300… so we can kiss most of that one weeks vacation pay goodbye.

Turned out he couldn’t do it Monday because he seems to have misplaced his birth certificate so now we have to get a new one of those… there’s another $10 out the window!!

Then yesterday…. I guess we spent time together but it didn’t seem like it. We went by to visit his mother, we were there for an hour and a half listening to her spew bible talk for pretty much the entire time…. apparently EVERYTHING somehow relates to the bible and the bible applies to EVERYTHING!!

I have no problem with the bible or religious people…. But I can’t sit there listening to that for very long either. Yes I’m glad you found religion and God/Jesus/the bible…. whatever it is, is helping you through these trying times in your life but there has simply got to be something else to talk about… anything!!

Apparently not!!

Then we went grocery shopping – woo hoo!!

By the time we got home we had about an hour and a half before Sam had to go look at a truck he was considering buying. Him and Brandon were gonna go look at it together, and apparently Brandon suggested they get together either before or after to shoot their bows – yippie!! hehehe

I had no problem with that plan though, really as long as Brandon came here to do this because I really just felt like sticking close to Sam yesterday so I didn’t want him disappearing for hours on end. I know I’m a selfish shrew!! hehehe but it seems like every time Brandon is involved with anything it ends up taking several hours out of the day... or night

Sam calls Brandon to make sure they’re still on for this and get a load of this….

They wanted to know if it was ok if Janet came and hung out with me while they were gone. I have no idea why… maybe she doesn’t like to be alone or something. I would think with a 7 year old and the fact that they’re moving in a week that she would have been grateful to get some alone time!! but maybe I’m just nuts….

Anyway I said I didn’t mind ‘babysitting’ this 36 year old wife and mother for a couple hours and then I suggested that they just stay for dinner. So there I was making the dreaded small talk with this chick for like 2 hours while the boys were off checking out chassis and fondling their dipsticks.

Did I ever mention how much I FUCKING DESPISE small talk?!?!?!

In our old apartment I would wait till everyone else in the building (there were only 3 apartments) left for the day before I would go out of the house just so I wouldn’t get stuck making small talk in the hallway!! And when I happen to notice someone I know or once knew at the grocery store or the mall I spin around on my heels and take off in the opposite direction. I know it’s rude, I’m a big jerk – whatever I’m just not comfortable chit chatting with everyone about nonsense that nobody gives a crap about.

For example I made the mistake of mentioning how badly I want to get a new aquarium because I miss my fish, who were casualties of a change in surroundings a while back.

She proceeds to tell me all about her father’s fish,

hehadlike10tanksandhehadthiskindandthatkind….

and this one time at fish camp I stuck a trout in my pussy!!

I was just expecting Sam’s mother to pop in and start spewing about Jonah and the whale because whales eat fish and we’re all God’s creatures!! Actually, knowing her she probably thinks a whale IS a fish….

Anyway…. This time around dinner didn’t sit in the oven drying into sawdust while we waited for the boys to play!! And it was super yummy… so I guess that means they’ll be back…. yippie!! hehehe

Just kidding…. It wasn’t as bad as I’m making it out… in fact at the time I didn’t really have a problem at all…. It wasn’t until the middle of the night that I realized Sam’s two days off were over and we hardly got to spend any time together. BUT he only has to work three days before he has another two days off!! YAY!!!

Anyway that is the story of my last two days… You can see why I’m totally uninspired!! hehehe

porn & pizza....

Things have been pretty rough between us lately (sexually) ….I have no idea why really but we’re both feeling it so I’m not gonna complain!! haaaa

Maybe it’s the frustration of being told tab A can’t go near slot B for two long weeks!! Maybe it’s the pressure of the job change…. Who knows!

I was totally exhausted yesterday for some reason

Ooh Deep Purple just came on!! I just have to say I think Ian Gillan has one of the most awesome voices!!

Sorry…. I’m easily distracted lately hehehe – anyway as I was saying I was totally exhausted yesterday. I had crammed about a weeks worth of stuff into one day on Friday, I’m trying to get back on track with my housework and other assorted chores plus I cooked a huge meal and we had company that night.

By the time we actually sat down and ate after the boys got done playing with their toys, dinner was pretty much annihilated so I was NOT happy!! I haven’t been feeling quite up to snuff as it was. Then I didn’t sleep well (because I was so irritated by my ruined dinner!!) then I woke up with a headache and the day just wasn’t good.

Time got away from me and I couldn’t think of anything to make for dinner. And I had no interest in cooking after the irritation over Friday night’s dinner.

I think Sam was feeling bad about what happened to what would have otherwise been probably one of the most perfect meals I’ve ever cooked. So when he came home he offered to pick up pizza and wings.

I’d wanted pizza for days so I was thrilled and with that little offer and the pressure of what to make for dinner lifted my mood was completely fixed!!

While we waited for the pizza Sam went and rented a movie. Which reminds me…. since the movie seemed to center around girls getting it in the ass. I know I’ve mentioned I’m not really big into porn and some of the activities featured in a lot of the scenes make me wonder…. Are there a lot of people who get off on the idea of watching a girl lick something that was just in her ass??

Maybe I’m some kind of prude but I’m sorry… as far as I’m concerned THESE lips, THIS tongue…. touch NOTHING that has been in anyone’s ass – even MINE!! No amount of cleansing will change my mind!! I don’t care if you empty the pharmacy of every enema on the market!! hehehe

So I was just curious…. Is this something that the average guy out there really finds appealing or what? Why does it seem that EVERY anal scene at some point includes at least one ass to mouth bit?

ATM scenes aside this no sex deal has been eating at me, and the mere mention of anything that could even be considered sexual makes my ears perk up!

Anyway it was a quiet night and I really needed that!! We did the pizza and porn thing and watched big brother of course… I had to know who was gonna get booted!! – yes I know I’m a huge dork!!

Shortly after that we ended up in bed… I so could have slept the second my head hit the pillow but I guess Sam had other plans. I’ll spare you the details but I’ll tell you it involved rope, ‘kidnapping’, a bit of a struggle, face slapping, tit slapping, name calling, jaw stretching, mouth fucking – within what seemed like seconds I turned into a dripping wet, whimpering, quivering jelly girl!!

Yum!!

I slept like a baby….

extra extra read all about it!!

For anyone who’s ever stared into the hypnotic glow of their computer screen longing to feel the touch of that special someone too many miles away…. or the person too shy and awkward to strike up a conversation, who only dreams of being able to get into the pants of that cute little checker down at the A&P.

Your lonely days are over baby!!

Imagine being able to have awesome, completely uninhibited sex with ANYONE you want!! Have a thing for the drummer of your favorite band? How ‘bout a porn star? Or maybe even your current blog crush hehehe

According to the Weekly World News, the only news worth reading in my opinion. It’s entirely doable!! And best of all it’s completely safe in every way…. Don’t believe me? You can read all about it right here!!

In other news….

Girl with green baby, raped by leprechaun!!

click the pic... or else!!

ch-ch-ch-ch-changes....

Well it’s official…. Sam is probably putting in his notice at work as I write this! This time next week he’ll be starting a brand new job – woo hoo!!

I wonder if his boss will tell him to leave right then and there like he did the last guy who put in his notice!?!?!

I’m happy for him that he’s getting out of this job he seems to hate. Although I suspect that if the other people that work there weren’t so negative he wouldn’t hate it so much himself!! But as it is, he does so I’m glad he’s moving on. Even if he liked the job itself there’s no chance for advancement and well…. with only getting a whopping FIFTY CENT raise a year we couldn’t afford for him to work there much longer anyway!! The price of gas has gone up more than fifty cents a gallon since he started there a little over a year ago.

I almost puked at the fact that we paid $2.63 a gallon to fill our tank yesterday!! Can’t wait to see how it is by Labor Day!!

Anyway as happy as I am for him moving on to something he’ll like better… (driving a truck) I HATE change!! I have always hated whenever he’s changed jobs…. and this one I’ll hate more because I won’t have any way to contact him all day :(

But it starts earlier…. It’s more of a 7-3 kinda job and he’ll have weekends off… like a normal person, so that will be nice!! And it will be nice for him to not be stuck in retail hell any longer.

But still…. change always makes me uneasy, even when it’s for the better!!

jungle man fix jane....

**WARNING** this post contains information (of a sexual nature) that may make certain people uncomfortable!!

I know I mentioned the temporary ban on sex in kittyville…. Nothing makes me want sex more than being told I can’t have any!! But the fact is, any kind of ‘intercourse’ would be uncomfortable at best right now

And obviously I’ve been feeling kinda sorry for myself… at least that seemed pretty clear to me with the insane rambling I’ve been doing for the last couple days. I can’t wait to go back and read this weekend’s posts a few months from now!!

Anyway Sam has been on edge too with all this job stuff that I won’t bother getting into at the moment. And I’m sure the great sex ban of 2005 is eating at him already especially since I’ve been feeling too yucky to give him proper… ummm…. attention - to take the edge off.

So obviously I had a bad day yesterday….

But after I posted that whining junk I pulled myself away from this glowing distraction and got some stuff done and I felt a little better… I was still wired which makes me kind of irritable. So when Sam came home and he seemed kinda wired we just fed off eachother until we ended up having a fight over the fact that I like my venison more well done than him. He ended up wrapping up his dinner and playing Grand Theft Auto because he said he lost his appetite.

Suddenly I got mine back and managed to eat my slightly underdone venison and peppers and stuff while I watched Sam blow people’s heads off. He’s the one that wanted this for dinner and since he has no appetite I’m damn well gonna eat it and enjoy it… or at least make him think so!! hehehe

Later I snuggled up in my big comfy chair watching the blue collar comedy tour rides again (Bill Engvall totally cracks me up!!) – and Sam sat here looking at some porn – woo hoo – you can tell we’re a happily married couple can’t ya? hehehe

I was just trying to keep myself awake long enough to see the Pam Anderson roast!! I have no idea what he was doing hehehe but it seemed best that for the evening we should do our own things.

At some point he got bored and stomped off to bed – since it was only like 9:30 I took that as a sign that I should go with him….

We weren’t really fighting anymore by this point but we were both on edge….

We were talking about how it sucks that we can’t have sex and the next thing I know he’s got me blindfolded and is tying my wrists (rather tightly) behind my back…. then he pinned me down to the bed and I could hear his hand stroking his cock. I could feel it pressing against my tits… poking hard at them getting them all slippery.

I could feel my panties getting very wet very quick as my shoulders and wrists strained against the tightness of the rope and I just lay there unable to move.

He shoved his fingers in my mouth one at a time until he had 4 in there, stretching my jaw tight as he fucked my mouth with his hand and my tits with his rock hard cock.

He asked “you like that?” and I shook my head yes…. wiggling against the rope and he slapped at my tits…. “you’re a good little slut aren’t you?” I nodded again trying to say yes but it just sounded like a groan.

Then he yanked my head and shoved his cock in my mouth – I was in an awkward position so I did my best to protect him from my teeth as I swallowed him in as deep as I could. All I could hear was him grunting as he fucked my mouth. By now I was sure I was leaving a puddle of wetness on the bed and I wanted nothing more than to feel his hot cum on my skin!

Just then he slid his cock out of my mouth and pulled off my blindfold so I could watch as he covered my face and chest in what seemed like a gallon of semen. And I licked what I could from my lips as he did his best to clean me up and untie me.

Then I turned on the tv and we snuggled up under the covers watching the last half of the Pam Anderson roast on comedy central.

Courtney Love, clean and sober? – I think not!!

more whining....

I’ve been up since 4am – I’m wired – I’m irritable – I’m anxious as all hell

The OCD is driving me even crazier lately and I have no idea what’s eating at me!

I woke up with a headache – I won’t call it a migraine because I didn’t feel like sticking an M-80 in my mouth and lighting the fuse, but it was enough to get me out of bed in search of some excedrin. When this happens I have a very small window in which to get myself back to sleep or ZOOM the caffeine kicks in and I’m racing!!

My mind starts going in 15 different directions (usually not positive) I start composing letters of complaint to this person or that. This morning it was the doctor I saw yesterday that was the focus of my irritation. I started fantasizing about telling him to take a deep breath and sit his ass down because for $68 I damn well intend to get my full 15 minutes of time with him!! And then telling him what I think would make him a better doctor hehehe – as if he’d give a shit…. The guy is the head doctor of an entire hospital and chain of clinics associated with that hospital – apparently someone thinks he’s good at what he does ~ shrug

In other news… although I’m sure it’s all related - I’m totally out of control!! My house is a mess and I feel like it will never be right! I’m a very ‘a place for everything and everything in it’s place’ kinda thinker BUT since we moved in here it seems like NOTHING has a proper place – I have to search for the most mundane every day items.

I look around and just shake my head…. At this point we’ve been here far too long to use the ‘we just moved in’ excuse…. I blame it on the fact that we have not ONE single closet in the whole place. And while that certainly doesn’t help matters any… the truth is I have the kind of brain that can get around something like that.

If I could just relax and focus this place would NOT look like the home of someone wearing a tin foil hat who would likely have 572 copies of Catcher In The Rye stacked in even numbered piles all facing north

I don’t know what’s wrong with me! Why can’t I get it together?

I find myself sitting in front of this idiot box more than anything else because it’s the only thing that distracts me from the fact that I can’t get it together. But it is surely keeping me from doing anything about it too!!

Obviously blogging was the last thing in the world I needed to take up but here I am wasting even MORE time rambling about nothing on an almost daily basis.

I’m not keeping up my end of the bargain with Sam in ANY way!

Dinner is rarely ready when he gets home – the laundry is almost never put away properly – one of the things on my chore chart is to work out 3 times a week…. Because otherwise I would completely let it slip my mind because I HATE doing it!!

Who the hell wants to work out? If you say you enjoy it you’re either full of shit or nuts!

Anyway since we started with this whole chore chart thing I have only crossed off ‘work out’ ONCE

The thing that’s probably making me feel the worst is that I’m letting Sam down…. I know what I need to do and I know anything he gets on my ass about is for my own good – so why can’t I get it together???

What is missing that’s keeping me from functioning properly? Do I have a loose cog? Did I spring a sprocket?

---by the way I just got a bug up my butt to take my screen door off the hinges and guess what…. It turns out that screen actually keeps out quite a bit of light!! Now I’m torn…. Without the screen door I can put a mat down to hopefully keep so much damn mud and stuff from being strewn across the house…. But on the other hand… all that bright light and I start going all Nosferatu - at least I don’t have Count Orlok’s rodent teeth and beady eyes!!

Give me back my nice cool darkness!!

Ok back to the topic at hand….
I constantly feel like I’m shoveling shit against the tide…. There must be a solution… but what????

one of those days....

I knew that pain was clouding my judgment do my eyes deceive me or did I completely leave Jethro Tull, Queen & STP off that top 20 list the other day?!?!?

I was talking to Sam last night about that list, his list is similar but very different!! and we started mentioning things like Slayer, MISFITS & Suicidal Tendencies

So lets make another little listy poo – why? because I fucking feel like it!!

My Top 10 Bands – today anyway hehehe (in no particular order)

Led Zeppelin
Jethro Tull
Queen
Crosby Still & Nash
The Doors
The Beatles
Stone Temple Pilots
Rush
Alice In Chains
Slayer (if I’m listening to slayer things are not all peachy keen in kittyville)

Can you guess what I’m listening to right now?

kitty and the doctor....

Wanna know why I avoid going to the doctor like the fucking plague? Why I hoard amoxicillin or bum it from friends and family when I end up with my yearly sinus infection? Why I’m 5 months overdue for my PAP junk even though I’ve skipped 2 of my last 4 periods?

Well I’ll tell you why!! Wednesday morning I woke up with what appeared to be a bladder infection, I’ve never had one before but I’ve known people who have and I read about my symptoms in my usual attempt at self-diagnosis and treatment. I did all the typical stuff; I’ve been drinking my weight in water and cranberry juice, taking echinacea, acidophilus and cranberry pills.

But I stupidly kept reading (damn the internet!!) and was getting overly anxious about the idea of this turning into a kidney infection. Ahhh suckered in again I made an appointment because my sister was headed to the doctor’s office anyway. I took that as a sign that I should just bite the bullet… better safe than sorry, right?

WRONG!!

So there I sit on that paper-covered table having a fucking anxiety attack because I HATE being there! My blood pressure was 156/110!!!! I said “so great I’m gonna have a stroke too huh?” The nurse-like person says “ya don’t wanna do that”

HaHa

The doctor breezes in a minute or two later, HOLY SHIT that was quick I think… usually I’m left back there on that paper table like a damn guinea pig for some space alien, waiting for my anal probe for 25 minutes while I get to listen to the doctor on the phone in his office telling his wife he’ll try to remember to pick up milk on his way home or some such nonsense.

it’s no wonder he was so quick to get to me judging by the speed with which he completes his examinations.

He introduces himself and offers his hand to shake (I have OCD hand shaking ain’t my thing - especially with people who handle germs for a living!!) but I do it anyway because I’m a wimp.

anyway we’ve met before so the fact that he was introducing himself was not encouraging! I say "hi, I’m Kitty but I guess you already knew that huh?” (since he was looking right at my chart)

then he says so what’s wrong today? As I was in the middle of telling him he asks me my name. Apparently he had forgotten our little exchange from 30 seconds ago.

Then he looks down at my chart….

Him: “Whoa why is your blood pressure so high?”

Me: “because I’m riddled with bordering on crippling anxiety on a daily basis and being ill makes it worse… oh yeah and I DON’T LIKE YOU!”

Him: “oh ok”

Then he asks me another question and proceeds to cut me off mid-answer to ask me yet another question! Apparently he got all the information he thought he needed. He walks out and checks the little testy do-dad in my steaming cup of freshly produced piss only to breeze back in to tell me I was right about the bladder infection.

“your diagnosis was right, you have a bladder infection…. Your sample was loaded!”

gee thanks Doc how does it make you feel to know I was able to diagnose myself at home for free when it probably cost you more money than I’ll see in a lifetime to be able to make it official?

He begins writing a prescription for some drug he claims will ease my pain but will make me piss orange!!

Uh… ya know what I’m really not in a lot of pain so if it’s all the same to you I’ll skip the unnecessary drugs this time…. unless of course they’ll get me high and make me forget I was here??

....No? ok

He hands me the prescription for an antibiotic of some sort and sends me on my way…. The whole visit took no more than 5 minutes (including the time with the nurse taking my pulse and stuff)

Out in the waiting room again the receptionist asks me “what are you gonna be paying today?”

I said “I have no idea yet you haven’t told me…. but keep in mind that I’m poor…. I have no insurance for a reason!!”

After checking with the doctor she turns back to me and says:

“ok Ma’am that’ll be $68”

oh great…. Another 20 year old calling me Ma’am – what do I look like a fucking old lady???

– wait a minute….

“SIXTY-EIGHT DOLARS?!?!?! Did you not catch the part about me being poor??

No expression – no response

I proceed to write the check being sure to tell the girl “hope it clears!” not that she cares.

And I leave…. My sister tells me in the car that that is the reduced fee; normally it costs more like $80

Well don’t I feel fucking special now!! last time I was there – about a year ago (for a rash I still have by the way) it was $50 so that was what I was prepared to pay.

Anyway fast forward to the pharmacy….

My mother goes up and drops off my prescription for me and I go back with her a little while later to pick it up…. Meanwhile I was scrounging around my house for money to pay for it with and as we left I said I hope it isn’t more than $6 cause that’s all I have… knowing full well I’d need to use a credit card to pay for it because it would be at least $10…. But I figured that would be about it considering it’s a very old drug and it’s generic and there are only 20 of them. You can get about a million amoxicillins for like $15 so I wasn’t too concerned.

So imagine my surprise when I get up to the counter and the girl tells me it’s $30!!!!

My eyes widen to the size of saucers and my jaw drops to the floor like some old-time cartoon character.

Surely there’s been a mistake!! – I looked at the girl who looked like she was born the year Nirvana put an end to hair bands…. and said: “ARE YOU SURE?”

I got more blank staring and zero response – apparently it’s true… these pills cost $1.50 a piece!!!

I shook my head and loudly told my mother how fucking ridiculous I thought that was, since we had just discussed how cheap they should be considering they aren’t some kinda new fancy drug. I paid because… well what choice did I have? And I left….

As I was walking out there door it struck me…. I just spent $100 today for the pleasure of getting a palm full of cooties, a rude 5-minute conversation about my urethra and 20 tiny tablets.

I think I’m gonna puke!!! Or have that stroke now….

Anyway THAT is why people in this country don’t go to the doctor and why people die every day of curable diseases!!

feeling yucky....

Not much to report… I haven’t been feeling very well so I haven’t had much energy to blog. So until I’m fully functioning why don’t you sit back and yawn at my list of 20 essential albums….

here they are, 20 essential albums in no particular order - and yes ‘greatest hits’ count!! otherwise it would be virtually impossible to narrow it down!!! So there!! : P

1. Crosby Stills, Nash & Young ~ So Far
2. Van Morrison ~ Moondance
3. Led Zeppelin ~ Complete Studio recordings (I know it’s cheating but it’s Led Zeppelin for fuck sake!)
if I had to narrow it down I’d go with IV and Physical Graffiti - but I’m not bumping anything else to make room that way either!! :P
4. Alice in Chains ~ Unplugged
5. Mother Love Bone ~ self titled
6. Beatles ~ Abbey Road
7. Beatles ~ white album
8. Metallica ~ Kill ‘Em All
9. Rush ~ The Spirit Of Radio
10. Ramones ~ Hey! Ho! Let’s Go
11. Simon & Garfunkel ~ Greatest Hits
12. Blondie ~ Autoamerican
13. The Essential Stevie Ray Vaughan and Double Trouble
14. Squirrel Nut Zippers ~ Hot
15. Morphine ~ Yes
16. AC/DC ~ Back In Black
17. Days Of The New ~ self titled
18. Danzig ~ self titled
19. Oasis ~ What’s The Story Morning Glory?
20. I’d have to make my own Aerosmith cd with all the good stuff like seasons of wither, kings and queens, mama kin – etc. because they don’t have one acceptable greatest hits type album

ok I think that’s it…. but this pain could be clouding my judgment hehehe

tag... you're it!!

Well I’m working on the rest of that spanking story, such as it is. But in the meantime apparently I’ve been tagged by angel So I’ll post that for now.

I guess I’m supposed to list 5 of my idiosyncrasies – I don’t know how I could possibly narrow it down to 5 considering I must have thousands, but I’ll give it a shot…. hehehe

1. I can’t handle paper without repeatedly blowing on it, this includes books which is another reason why I don’t read very often these days : ( I hafta blow on the pages before turning them, blow on my bills or letters before stuffing them into envelopes - etc. etc. etc.

2. When I send away for something I never use my real name so as a result I have a bunch of free address labels that say things like Princess Pickle Pants or something equally silly – this is how I determine who is selling my address

3. I have a fear of crossing the street by myself – we used to live in this little village and the post office was across a moderately busy street. I can probably count on my two hands the number of times I crossed by myself to get the mail in the nearly 3 years we lived there!

4. I almost never call anyone by their actual name… either I get to know them well enough to give them some goofy nickname or I just say ‘hey’ to get their attention – this includes my husband, who over the years has had many different names. If we go to a party or something where there are people who don’t know us very well they look at us all confused when I say “hey Pete” or “hey Bob” to get his attention and they say “I thought his name was Sam?!?!?!” hehehe

5. I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before but I often act like a little kid, I color, skip, and talk like a little girl, watch zoom and read comics and just generally behave like a child. I probably do it most when I’m stressed… I’m not really sure why but I know that every single adult I know thinks it’s totally bizarre!!

There we go – hmmm I don’t really know 5 people to tag…. let see

~ Brian (so you can post something other than lyrics for a change) hehehe
~ NSM (so you can stop pining for a moment)
~ julio (because you’ve been too quiet since you started back to work)
~ Mark (because you crack me up)
~ SJR (because I doubt you’ll ever see this because you’re too busy teasing all the girlies) hehehe

Plan B....

**WARNING** this post contains information (of a lifestyle & sexual nature) that may make certain people uncomfortable!!

Ok this is gonna sound odd to most people I’m sure but I’m writing it anyway because well… my life is my life and if I can’t write what I’m thinking about then there’s no point in being here.

We’re not normally spanking type people. As far as punishments go for me, the typical thing would be to take away my keyboard since if I’m being ‘punished’ for something chances are it’s for not getting all my chores done which anyone with a stat tracker, email or icq probably knows is most likely because I was wasting time online. Normally Sam lets it slide if I don’t do one or two things on my chart (yes I have a chore chart) because I often have several other things to do that aren’t on the chart, and he’s a big softy!

The reason I have this chore chart is because our current living situation has me feeling very chaotic and unsettled, and after a long time of letting things get out of control we came to the conclusion that I needed something visual to keep me focused during the day when he’s not here, and that if I didn’t keep up with it there would be some kind of punishment, because the whole idea is to make me feel like I have more structure (something I desperately need!!)

However I had been being particularly lazy lately and I guess life was getting in the way of him paying attention to that. The other day, shortly before we went to bed he decided to check my chore chart and discovered that I hadn’t crossed off a single thing that day. I told him I did stuff I just didn’t bother to cross it off. Then he went over it with me item by item and it turned out I hadn’t done about half of my chores!! He wasn’t happy about the fact that I’d been slacking and I guess he thought he needed to try something different.

He’s threatened to spank me many times and of course he’s smacked my ass plenty but never anything serious. It’s not something I particularly enjoy and to be honest the thought of being spanked as a form of punishment seemed like it would be a good idea since I don’t exactly enjoy that kind of pain.

As much as I enjoy reading about people being spanked and thinking about the whole idea of being put over someone’s knee like that is a huge turn on for me. I always thought I guess that it was something better left in my imagination, that I wouldn’t actually like it personally so much as I liked the idea of it.

So when he told me that was his intention I wasn’t thrilled! But there I was bare assed as he counted off one whack for each unfinished chore. Not bad at all actually as far as spanking goes, it only added up to six whacks.

When he was done he kissed my cheek said something about me trying harder in the future (I’m not real good with remembering exact words) and honestly I wasn’t quite thinking clearly at the moment.

Apparently during the course of those 6 whacks he noticed my secondary reaction. In addition to the pinkish red hue my ass now had (he wasn’t being particularly gentle) I was now extremely wet! which I hadn’t even noticed. Next thing I knew he had shoved his hand between my legs and I was so wet his fingers slid right in me effortlessly.

This led to a whole other story that I guess I’ll hafta save for tomorrow….

SERENITY NOW!!

Apparently it’s one of those weekends where you can’t get a moments peace!
All I wanna do is veg out and be lazy and the fucking phone keeps ringing!!
Yes Sam I know…. UNPLUG IT! – But then what would I have to complain about?

Ok I know I’m slightly more intolerant because I don’t actually have children of my own but I swear if I ever do I will spare everyone I know the irritation of putting them on the phone to ‘say hello’ - what the hell is up with that?

Putting a 20-month-old child on the phone is like taking Helen Keller to a concert and asking her to tell you how she liked it afterward. What the fuck is the point????

It’s painful to endure! Do these people think it’s cute? or amusing? I have news for you, listening to your child lick the phone while you chant “Say Hi!” in the background, is not my idea of a good time!! A good WASTE of time? Sure but my patience is too short! Especially when your other child is screaming for attention in the background!

"Can you hold on a sec while I give Spaz more sugary, artificially colored between meal snacks?"

"Oh sure…. Maybe that will calm him down!! I’ll just sit here patiently looking up the number to the nearest place to GET MY TUBES TIED…. No really listening to him whine while you ‘count to 3’ is like the modern 30-somethings answer to the Muzak version of Muskrat Love… maybe they should record you for use when putting someone on hold at Planned Parenthood!!"

hey… I LOVE you and your children dearly but next time…. call while they’re having a nap, ok?

music to strip to....

I was just sitting here and this song came on and I got to thinking, if I was ever gonna strip for someone this would be the song I would use… I know you can’t get it from just the lyrics but I’ve always thought this would be an awesome song to strip to! Seems appropriate because I think the rest of the album should’ve been called “music to fuck to” hehehe

Anyway here it is….

She Rides ~ Danzig

she rides
let loose upon the world
she is the night
and my loneliness in bondage
she's black
and sin runs down her back
she rides
from the daylight in chains

she rides the night
she rides the night
she slides
down inside your skin
in time
she will make you scream
she's death
in a ghoul white dress
she rides
in the night of your mind

she rides the night
she rides the night
yea
she'll take you down
she'll take you
she'll take you around
she'll take you down
she'll take you
she'll take you around

she rides
let loose upon the world
she is the night
and my loneliness in bondage
she's black
and sin runs down her back
she rides
from the daylight in chains

she rides the night
she rides the night

ooh yea
she'll take you down
she'll take you
she'll take you around

and the idiot of the month award goes to….

me of course…

The other day while I was out doing the yard sale thing with Natalie, I wasn’t paying attention and took $20 out of the bank before we had a chance to deposit Sam’s paycheck. This left us $10 short for the car insurance, which I paid prematurely (it still isn’t due for another 2 days)

So basically everything I got when I was out “bargain hunting” actually cost me an extra $30!!

So there we go… my very first insufficient funds charge…. argh!! a perfect record shattered for a stupid french dip!! hehehe

---

So this week was the 3rd week in a row we went over to Brandon & Janet’s and I think that’s my limit! I must insist that if we continue to hang out with them that they come to us once in a while.

I’m sick of getting dressed and hanging out over there for hours upon hours in my shoes and bra and the whole shebang, and then having to drive home in the wee hours of the morning!

I like them and all but enough is enough… not to mention that gas ain’t exactly cheap these days! Yup that’s it… I refuse to go over there again until they’ve come to our house at least once!!

---

Natalie decided to have a halloween party this year for disco bean’s birthday, WOO HOO!! He’ll be 2. Of course I signed on to help her with it, since Halloween is kinda my thing.

If I’m ever in a position to afford it I’d love to have my own ‘haunted house’ or even a whole village type thing like they do for Christmas only all spooky and halloweenish.

I sometimes spend hours just thinking and reading about different cool gross and spooky things to make for such a place so I’m usually the first one anyone calls when they’re planning to have a Halloween party because they know it’s the one time they can ask me for help and I’m all over it with a million ideas.

If only these kids were older, then I could really sink my teeth into it. But I don’t want to give them nightmares hehehe as far as kids go it will mostly be 2-8 year olds.

So anyway now I have to come up with a costume…. Any ideas?

I’m usually something ‘undead’ like one year I was a bride, all mangled and dirty, then there was the zombie housewife, which obviously wasn’t much of a stretch from reality (aside from the bloody rolling pin) I’ve already done the typical vampire bit. Of course I’ve done the cat thing, although I was considering resurrecting the cat idea, only with more of a road kill theme. hmmm anyway, we’ll see.

I guess that’s it for now…

you asked for it....

Twisting nipples
Ice cubes hardening
Trickling water drips
Tugging clips
Instant wanting
Excessively wet
Slippery Sweetness

My Weekend....

Friday:

Well I know Friday isn’t part of the weekend but it’s close enough hehehe
On Friday Natalie asked me to ride along with her to the pediatrician, because she had an extra kid with her and she thought 3 would be too much to handle.

She doesn’t ask me for much, so I put aside my selfish desire to stay home and hibernate and went with her. It wasn’t so bad; I mean who wouldn’t love sitting in a parked car for an hour with a shy 6 year old and a 20 month old in July?

The 6 year old pretty much made me watch him play catch with his stuffed horse for most of the time. on a few occasions he came dangerously close to hitting me in the face with the ball, which of course he blamed on ‘horsey’ hehehe
The 20 month old is the quietest kid you’ve ever seen so he wasn’t much trouble.

Afterward Natalie bought us all ice cream cones which was nice - I ate my cone against my better judgment because this place has killer ice cream!! How could I resist? I really like ice cream but it’s certainly not my first choice as far as bad foods go so of course after I ate it I felt guilty….

When I got home I discovered that apparently either a fox or someone’s dog had decapitated one of my chickens!! I wish I had been here to see it because if it was one of our ‘back yard’ neighbor’s dogs again I have a feeling he’d have a world of trouble on his hands. So now I’m keeping my eye out for murderous mutts in my yard… I’m not happy!!

Saturday:

Saturday was a lazy day…. I did some cleaning but nothing major. I watched a couple movies, by watched I mean they were on while I was dusting and stuff.
Every year around this time I start itching to see horror movies…. So first was Nightmare On Elm Street Don’t know why but I just love that movie, maybe it’s Johnny Depp hehehe

Next was Dementia 13 which is a really good kinda creepy black & white movie from the early 60’s done by Francis Ford Coppola.

It was a really nice quiet day, lazy but productive and full of blood curdling screams, which pretty much spells perfect to me hehehe

Later that night me and Sam were sitting in the living room and he looks over at me and says “am I ever gonna get another blowjob” I just looked at him like he was nuts! “why?” I asked, “has it been that long?” he just nodded his head. I apologized. He knows I haven’t been feeling well physically OR mentally lately and he’s been really patient with me! I felt bad but my stomach felt worse so I promised to make it up to him ASAP.

Sunday:

As Sam was getting ready for work he stopped me in the kitchen and told me that when I do get back to work, I’m gonna have “A LOT to deal with!” I just laughed and kinda licked my lips… and said “yeah but it’ll be quick!!” hehehe
He shook his head and continued getting ready to leave.

of course I was kidding.... I don't want it to be quick!!

On Sunday mornings I have a little bit of a ritual…. Once Sam leaves for work I plop down at my desk, turn on the radio and listen to FLASHBACK while I flip through the new Post Secret entries. Pretty much every week there is at least one card that stands out to me. This week it was this one:

I wasn’t quite that big but by the time I was 13 I was about a D…. I didn’t have the problem that girl seems to have though. I mean the boys liked them but so did I! they’re a little bigger now and I still love them. Even though they have been known to give me neck pain, when someone asks why I don’t get breast reduction surgery I just say "because they are part of me and I love them, I think I’d be lost without them" hehehe "what the heck would I do when I was bored if I didn’t have them to play with???"

I can often be found with my shirt flipped up because I had been playing with them and I didn’t even notice. Sam seems to get a kick out of it! sometimes I catch him staring at me and when I ask him why he just keeps staring down and I realize my shirt is up. I wonder if I ever do that when we have company and I just don’t even think about it! I know I’ve caught myself kinda pinching at my nipples through my shirt while I’m strolling through the grocery store or something.

Maybe they’re like some kind of security thing for me? hmmm

Anyway enough tittie talk….

As is usually the case my nice quiet FLASHBACK time was interrupted by the phone. It was Natalie again, wanting to know if I wanted to try to find some yard sales. Well I’m not one to turn down a day of yard sales so of course I was all over that idea!

We headed out around 9:30 or 10 and managed to hit about 20 in a big circle through like 7 towns. I know I’m not supposed to buy any more vhs but I couldn’t resist getting Natural Born Killers for 25 CENTS!!

Otherwise I was pretty good…. I found some blue silk roses for free to use for a possible Halloween costume as Lil from Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me
And I got some teletubbies videos for my niece, since they recently had their cable shut off. That should keep her occupied for a little while at least.

I also got a pretty purple sweater, which is not something I would ordinarily buy at a yard sale but it seems to be brand new and I have a feeling I’m gonna be needing some extra sweaters this winter on account of I’m pretty sure the cost of propane is gonna be a problem!!

We stopped at a diner and had lunch, I had a really yummy French Dip and guzzled about a quart of lemonade. It was soooooooo yucky out yesterday and Natalie was driving her husband’s car which has no AC so I was starting to get dehydrated I guess (normally I take about 3 sips of whatever drink I order)

It was a really nice day; we had a lot of fun. it was pretty much the first time we’ve gotten to go out for one of our all day yard sale outings all summer so it was nice.

Later that night once Sam was home I gave him his dinner and his long awaited blowjob. And all seemed right with the world!!

It was a really nice weekend!!